Your Post-Break-Up Guide to Being Alright Àpẹrẹ

Don’t Stuff Your Emotions

Break-ups are hard, whether you initiated the breakup or not; whether you’d been dating for five years or five months; even if you knew it was the right thing to do. Sometimes doing the right thing–like breaking up with someone who isn’t “the one” for you–hurts. It’s okay to grieve the relationship you lost. It’s okay to feel all the emotions you’re feeling right now. And it’s important to remember that conflicting feelings can co-exist.

●You can feel relieved the relationship is over and be sad it ended.

●You can feel heartbroken over what happened and be at peace with your decision.

●You can grieve the future you envisioned with someone and be hopeful for what’s next.

The most important thing is to feel.

It's natural to want to stuff your emotions after a breakup. You're feeling pain, sadness, and maybe even anger, and you just want to make it all go away. But the problem is that if you stuff your emotions, you never get the chance to process them and heal. Then, when you least expect it, these feelings arise (often at the worst time) because the hurt you’ve been carrying gets too heavy.

As painful as it is, it’s much better to allow yourself to feel everything now, especially if you want to move on and have a healthy relationship in the future. So be gentle with yourself and take some time to grieve. There are no rules for how long it takes to get over a breakup. So, there’s no need to judge yourself, whether it takes two days to feel better or 12 months.

Although post-break-up life can be hard, you don’t have to experience it alone. You don’t have to process all your big emotions by yourself. God is close to the brokenhearted–and that might be you right now. He is close to you so that you can lean into Him and not have to go through this season alone. Lean into His Word that’s filled with scriptures about the hopeful, beautiful future He has planned for you. Lean into His promises, and trust that His timing is perfect, even when it hurts.