Choosing Marriage: 7 Choices For Healthy RelationshipsНамуна

Always Use Protection: Choosing Boundaries

Anything of value is worth protecting. 

And marriage is certainly something of value. I can guarantee you with 100 percent certainty that if you’re reading this today, you are either struggling in your own marriage, or you know someone who is. And adding the word Christian in front of the word marriage doesn’t make you—or anyone else—less susceptible to the struggles you’ll face and the “intruders” you’ll battle. 

Every marriage needs boundaries—limits that keep the bad things out, and the good things in. You’ve got to be deliberate about protecting it. In 1 Corinthians 13:7, we read that one attribute of love is protection: “[Love] always protects.” Love doesn’t simply stay safe on its own, you have to learn to protect it. The problem is that people end up putting boundaries into place after something problematic happens in their relationship rather than before. But boundaries are most protective before temptation comes up. 

In assessing the boundaries in your relationship, there are three important areas to consider: your emotions—who you’re sharing them with and how often; your interactions—who you’re spending time with and why; and your time—where it’s being spent and how much? It’s not enough to wish for a healthy marriage, you’ve got to take the steps to make it happen. Maybe that means logging off social media and choosing a meaningful conversation instead. Maybe it means enriching our emotional expressions toward our spouse. Maybe it means applying greater caution in our interactions with the opposite sex. 

Whatever it means, we need to take the time to draw a circle of protection around our closest relationships, by acknowledging the areas of our lives that need boundaries, and then determining to make those boundaries a reality. 

Everything of value is worth protecting. And the gift of marriage is one of the most valuable things that will ever be entrusted to you. 

Question for Reflection: Which areas of my life do I need to draw a “circle of boundaries” around to protect my closest relationships? 

Today’s Prayer: Jesus, help me to see my role in protecting the love You’ve given me. Give me the courage to set boundaries and limits around my closest relationships. Amen.