When Your Marriage Isn't What You Thought It Would BeНамуна

Day 1: For Better, For Worse...

The excitement and anticipation leading up to the wedding day are truly special moments. The prospect of joining your life with your true love fills you with joy and expectation. I still vividly recall the day I married my husband—it was a blend of happiness and tranquility. Closing my eyes, I soaked in the sounds of my bridesmaids and family chatting, the makeup artist's laughter as she worked on my mother, and the gentle breeze outside. The venue was perfect, the colors just right, and everyone I cherished was there to witness our journey toward restoration. It was a day filled with bliss.

I remember my hairstylist posing the question, "How do you feel?" That day was so meaningful for me. I truly felt the words when I expressed, "I feel healed and loved by God."

Then came the next day—the reality check.

My husband, dealing with lingering anxiety, felt its weight intensify after the wedding. Pressures from family and social anxieties flared up, and he wasn't exactly in high spirits when we returned home. Instead of basking in bliss and peace, I found myself worried with anxiety, frustration, and disappointment. While I never expected a perfect Disney fairytale marriage, I did hope for a honeymoon phase. Well, that got completely overhauled. It hit me hard because it made me wonder, "If the first day of our marriage is like this, what does the rest of our life hold?" The vows mentioned "...for better or worse." but I didn't anticipate the "worse" showing up so soon.

Reflection:

We all have those unexpected twists in our marriages—the areas we didn't see coming, the situations we're constantly praying about, hoping for a divine change. These unexpected storms can be disheartening, tough, and frustrating, whether they hit you right from the start of your marriage or sneak up on you later down the road. It's like a daily struggle, isn't it? So, how do you regain the strength to face each new day?

1. Take a moment to jot down those frustrations you're wrestling with regarding your spouse and your marriage. Pour it out on paper, be completely transparent with yourself, and, most importantly, with God.

2. After you've laid it all out, ask God to help you see the situation from His perspective. Invite Him to share a scripture or a song that can become your anthem of hope and strength each day.

3. Write down the scripture and song in a place you'll see often, making it a consistent reminder of the hope you can find in God.

Trust me, He meets you in those moments. You're not alone in your struggles; there's support in your journey.