[Wisdom of Solomon] Mad at YouНамуна

Now You Know

Have you ever driven somewhere you have never been before? You drive slowly, hit all the potholes, miss turns, and all the locals get mad at you. In your neighborhood or city, you don’t need a map. You know where every pothole is, the shortcuts, and which streets to avoid altogether. Earlier, we talked about where the conflict came from. We said that the Bible tells us it comes from our passions, which are at war within us. This is true. I want to help you identify these passions. I want to show you where the potholes, bumps, cracks, and more are, where conflict can arise. Luckily, they are all P's, so they will be easy for you to remember: pride, personality, preferences, and predictability.

Pride says you don’t want to hear it anymore. You don’t want help on anything. You don’t want to know what’s going on. If your pride gets too high or you let it rise to the top, it could cause conflict. The opposite of pride is humility. Humility says, ”I may not need help on this, but I will be thankful for it anyway.”

The next one is personality. Conflict can arise because you and this other person have different personalities. If you are not careful, you can rub each other the wrong way. It could cause aggravation and friction.

The next P is preferences. Preferences say, ”I like it like this, and I don’t care if they like it another way.” This could be because one is male, and the other is female. One grew up in a big family, and one grew up in a small family. It could be that you ”know“ it’s better one way; if it is another, it will be all wrong.

The last P is predictability. This causes us to be mad way before something ever happens. It says, ”I already know” what he’s going to do… what she’s going to say. We ”know“ exactly how they will respond and already start to fight about it in our heads.

Of course, there are many other areas conflict could arise from, but even though these exist, it doesn't mean we have to give in to them. We can stop conflict before it occurs. We must remember that the Bible says love is patient; love is kind. It is not self-seeking or does not keep records of wrongs. It is not prideful or rude. Love says I know my pride, personality, and preference want this, but I love my spouse more. Love says, ”I think I know how they will respond, but I will give them the chance to respond anyway, hoping I am wrong.” Now that you know where conflict could come from, let love reign above them all.