[Wisdom of Solomon] Mad at YouНамуна

Time To Get on the Same Page

Have you ever felt ”off” with your spouse before? Do you want to do something when she doesn’t, or does he want to do something when you don’t? This then turns into this revolving door of no one ever being on the same page. This could also happen in the workplace. You think you’re doing what is supposed to be done, but then your boss thinks you should be doing something else. This all leads to conflict. You become dissatisfied and unmotivated, and then everything starts to brew.

In this passage, we see that Solomon and his wife were not on the same page. He had been working long nights. He was excited to see her, but she had already gone to bed. He says, "Open to me, my sister, my darling, my love." But she responds by telling him that she has already gone to bed. She didn’t want to get her feet dirty by getting up. We don’t know how many nights this happened, but conflict exists. This time it is explicitly about intimacy, but conflict comes in all shapes, sizes, and sources. For you, it may be about money. It may be that one is working too much and the other is at home with the kids all day. It could be that there is no sense of recognition and praise for what the other has been doing for the marriage and family. So, what ends up happening is that two people are missing connecting and are disconnecting instead. We tend to put our marriages last and spend way too much time on other things. We assume that the marriage will be okay because we put a ring on it. We don’t realize that we must work on our marriages more than anything.

Have you become apathetic in your marriage? Is there hope? There is. Our marriages must have nurturing and some cultivating of the garden to get the flowers to grow and connect with our spouses. When we get rid of the apathy and start to nurture our marriages, the result is that when conflict does arise, we respond to the situation instead of reacting. We get back on the same page. We remember who it is that we are in conflict with.