Choosing Our Friends and Companions Wisely Àpẹrẹ

Married Friends

While all Christians need to be careful with the companionships they allow in their lives, married Christian couples must be twice as careful. Your marriage is the primary human relationship that you have on this earth. The Bible even tells us that we need to leave our parents and family of origin when we get married. We need to cling to our spouse and become one with that person. This leaving not only applies to our biological families, but it also applies to our friendships. Marriage affects every relationship that we have in our lives. 

Once you get married, you are no longer single. This means that you do not have the time that you used to have to devote to your former relationships. Now, you have to devote your time, effort, and focus on your new married responsibilities. This can be especially difficult for men. Men tend to cling to ungodly relationships even when they are married. However, they need to form a bond with their wife. 

Many times, Christian wives wonder if they are allowed to address ungodly friendships in their husbands’ lives and still remain submissive and honoring them. The answer is: absolutely yes! The Bible tells us that we are our brother’s keeper. We have an obligation to raise our concerns if a Christian brother or sister is headed in any direction that is dangerous to their own soul. When that Christian is your spouse, the ungodly relationship can even endanger your home and your marriage. Therefore, it is a Christian wife’s responsibility to address such concerns. There is also a right way to do it. 

If you find yourself in a difficult situation with your husband’s friendships, you can address the matter and still honor God. Approach your husband gently without compromising your role as his helper or usurping his role as a leader in the home. The Bible teaches wives how to behave when they have disobedient husbands. The Word of God encourages such women to set their focus first on their own demeanor and on their own attitude. They need to show full devotion and submission to God first. However, submission is not silence. Godly wives can present their concerns to their husbands in a respectful manner that reflects their desire to honor God. Every Christian man needs a wife who is strong in the Lord and is not afraid to address ungodly patterns that she observes in her husband’s behavior. A godly wife is a great gift and the greatest friend.