Take Heart, Military Wife: The Journey to a Heart That Reflects God’s CharacterНамуна

The Clean Heart

Another day of navigating a deployment means another opportunity to recount my many failures. As I sat on the stairs, playing back scenarios in my head, I reflected on how quickly I had become someone I didn't like. In the art of trying to be everything to everyone, I failed on all accounts.

The growing pressure weighed heavy on my soul, and I was at a breaking point. Shame and guilt sat alongside me at this pity party, and I continued in my downward spiral. I questioned every little thing. I began comparing myself to other wives navigating deployment and started feeling envy towards them. I was frustrated at my husband, who was thousands of miles away, blaming him for how I felt.

Why is this all so hard for me? Why am I the only one struggling?

Amid my sadness and solitude, the Lord graciously reminded me that He has forgiven me, and He was with me. In an instant, something shifted within me. My "woe is me" moment turned into a time of prayer. I began laying it all at my Father's feet rather than holding it all in. I realized I didn't have to pretend with him. He welcomed my brutal honesty. There was something so freeing about relinquishing control and accepting His help.

In Psalms, David had a moment like this. He was riddled with guilt and felt the heaviness of his sin. Rather than continuing to hold on to it, he cried out to the Lord. God freed David from the weight he was carrying. David could rest in God's forgiveness. His heart was made clean.

Sometimes, it's too easy to rely on our own strength and try to carry the burdens of this military life on our own. Something beautiful happens when we lay our pride aside and cry out to the Lord for help.

Take heart, military wife. He forgives us of our sins and purifies us from the inside out. His presence tenderly comforts us and gently reminds us that we are made new in Him.

Pray

Today, ask the Lord to forgive the sin that has been revealed by the pressure of military life. Remember, it is good and kind of the Lord to allow us to go through trials. The extra pressure exposes our heart condition and requires us to turn to God. You are forgiven, military wife. His love and mercy for you are made new every morning.