Protect

Proverbs 4:23

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”

It’s important to protect your heart before dating after a divorce, and the best way to do that is to give yourself time. With time comes healing, forgiveness, perspective, and understanding. If your divorce is final and you’re no longer married, you are free to start dating. However, it’s a good idea to come up with some “rules” or boundaries to protect yourself.

For example, you may decide to wait at least a year after your divorce is finalized before you reenter the dating scene. Perhaps you think it’s best to wait to date again until your kids are older or out of the house. Or, maybe you don’t want to put a timeline on it, but you do want to experience certain things as a single person before you start dating again.

There is no rush to start dating after a divorce. You can take your time and date when you feel emotionally and spiritually ready. When you do start dating again, make sure to set healthy boundaries to protect yourself.

Boundaries for Dating After Divorce

Dating after divorce can be both exciting and daunting. On the one hand, you're finally moving on from your marriage and starting a new chapter in your life. On the other hand, you may feel rusty after being out of the dating game for so long, or you may be worried about making the same mistakes you made in your previous relationship. Setting healthy boundaries is crucial to enjoying an honorable and drama-free dating life after divorce.

One boundary you may want to set is how much you're willing to share about your past relationship. Discussing your divorce in general terms is okay, but try to avoid going into too much detail about what went wrong in your marriage. If you find yourself constantly talking about your ex, it may be an indication that you haven’t completely healed, forgiven, and moved on from the relationship.

Another boundary you may want to set is how often you're willing to see your ex. If you have kids together, you'll inevitably have to see each other on a regular basis. But if you don't have children, it's up to you how often (if at all) you want to communicate with your ex. You may even want to consider creating a "no contact" rule for yourself, where you agree not to contact or communicate with your ex for a certain period of time after your divorce is finalized. This can help prevent any awkwardness or hurt feelings that may come from seeing each other too soon after the breakup.

Finally, be sure to set boundaries with regard to your emotional well-being. Dating after divorce can be fun and exciting, but it's important not to put your entire self-worth on the line. Remember that you are worthy of love and respect regardless of whether or not you find a new partner right away. If someone isn't treating you well or respecting your boundaries, don't lower your standards. Move on.