Prioritize Friendship

Chad and I don’t have marriage all figured out, but one thing I wouldn’t trade for anything is our friendship. It hasn’t just happened across the years. We were taught to take intentional strategic measures. 

In the beginning, you spend lots of time together learning the ins and outs of the other person, and it’s exhilarating. You imagine life together will only capitalize on this emotional high. That is until other things begin competing for your attention. Between sports, work, phone calls, the Internet, and other interests, your wife’s yada-yada that once stopped you from swallowing a Big Mac now draws zero to little response. 

What your wife really wants is your friendship. 

She can’t tell you her desire is for you to pay attention to her and appreciate her as a person. Instead of evenings separated by sports, video games, and phones, she longs for good conversation. She just wants to talk to you, and for you to talk to her.

If you’re not intentional, your back and forth communication will become a constant dumpster fire, flaring up beyond the rim periodically, sending out sparks that can leave permanent scars. Your bride wants to take precedence in your life over the Internet, the kids, your phone, or whatever else is going on. If she doesn’t, you are communicating LOUD and CLEAR she isn’t important to you, without saying any words. 

To avoid near disaster, prioritize your friendship. One way to begin is to put the technology away, setting it aside at least an hour every evening. Conduct dinner in a technology-free zone, allowing only table conversations. Talk about the day, what you really want to do in the future, or what you have been reading. Be interested, encouraging and listen. Remember that your wife likes the real you. She is your biggest supporter and forever ally. It will likely become a pattern you will look forward to experiencing, and something your kids can grow into. 

Today, what two steps can you take to help your wife know her friendship is important to you?

There you have it—the Five Big Ones. I pray that this shortlist brings clarity into the mysterious workings of the love of your life. May God teach you what He needs you to know so that your marriage will be God-honoring and your greatest joy on this planet.

For more Truth-saturated, Gospel-centered resources from Cheri, visit http://www.sheyearns.com