Delight in Her

Everything is connected in the heart and mind of a woman. Or haven’t you noticed? In marriage, what you say, hear, and view with your eyes are intertwined with your personality, integrity, and love for your wife.

What your wife really wants is for you to delight in her– and her ALONE. Not the cute waitress. (Don’t comment or follow with your eyes.) Not the old girlfriend on Facebook. (Unfriend all past relationships or possibilities.) Not the gorgeous colleague at work. (No lunches. Don’t hang out with her. Set boundaries.) Not the scantily clad movie star. (Abstain.) Not the porn. Absolutely NOT.

Your bride walked the aisle for the fairytale. Great news! You are her fairytale. She anticipates being yours. YOUR eyes exclusively electrified by her. YOUR affection reserved for her. You, Mr. Bigshot, have attained Prince Charming status. Your wife is simply wondering how to be THE Princess in your eyes. 

But she can’t tell you. 

Everything around her screams society’s demand to accept a man’s weakness to look and long. “Looking is every man’s struggle. We’re going to look. It’s how God made us,” so we’re told…But is that really true? 

Proverbs 6:25 commands Christ-followers to “not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes.” Then Jesus unravels anything confusing about the matter in Matthew five where he calls even lustful mental activity adultery. This declaration illuminates the Truth. No. God did not design guys to gaze at enticing women to whom they are not married. That behavior is sin, plain and simple. Its power over man was beaten by the cross, just like every other offense. 

In this matter, God was kind in meeting your desires with the woman of your choosing. Gaze away at your stunning bride. She is your standard of beauty and the only place of freedom for your eyes, body, and your mind. Your wife wants you to delight in her alone. What a gift. 

Countless times have I heard my man tell me he delights in me, and me alone, across twenty plus years of marriage. Hearing I am enough never gets old. 

Take some time to consider your affections and the Truth of Scripture. What steps might you need to take to delight in your wife alone? How can you begin communicating your affection and let her know she is enough?