Ready Or Knot? By Scott KedershaSample

Day Five: What Do We Need to Know About Sex?

Scripture: 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, 1 Thessalonians 4:3

It’s time to talk about sex. This might be the most difficult day this week for some of us. I truly desire to rightly capture the heart of God as we dive into the subject of sex. I’ll start by telling you God loves you. Whether you’ve sinned sexually for as far back as you can remember or you’ve never looked at porn or crossed any boundaries physically, each of us walks into relationships and marriage with some level of pain, guilt, and shame connected to sex.

That’s why we need to talk about God’s design and plan for sexual intimacy both before and after the wedding day.  To that end, I want to introduce Rob and Crystal. Each brought a significant amount of sexual baggage into their dating and marriage relationship. Here’s the good news: in God’s remarkable grace and kindness, He enabled Rob and Crystal to pursue each other in a different way than either had dated in the past.

 Crystal is forthcoming in what made the difference: “We had to remember Romans 8:1. Paul said, ‘There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.’ There’s no sin so horrific that Jesus didn’t already pay the price for it. Satan will try to use the guilt of your past against you, and we chose not to let that happen in our relationship.”

Rob’s words are equally compelling: “For the first time in my life, I dated someone well. I chose to honor God and honor Crystal by pursuing her with purity. Every other relationship in my past was marked by my selfish sexual desires.”

I beg you, if you are crossing boundaries with regard to purity, choose to honor God with your body. One of the most comforting verses in the whole Bible to me is Hebrews 4:15: “We do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin.” He was tempted in many of the same ways you and I are tempted, yet He managed not to sin in the process. 

If you know you’re going to struggle, set strict boundaries. Surround yourself with friends who will help you stay the course for sexual purity and honor one another in this area. You will not regret doing so. 

Spend some time thinking back through your sexual past. What do you need to share with your significant other?