The Five Pillars of a Healthy MarriageSýnishorn

Becoming One / Friendship

Right from the outset of Genesis, we see God had a plan for a male & female in a covenant relationship.

He said in Genesis 2:24, “The two are united into one,” and this speaks to the deep friendship and intimacy which is the foundation for a healthy marriage. Not so surprisingly, these are also the foundations for a healthy relationship with God Himself. In Ps 139, the Psalmist speaks to the intimacy that the Father seeks from us.

When a relationship is fresh, friendship tends to come naturally. Good friends know each other well. They talk about what is going on in their lives and how they feel about it. Early on, it seems effortless. As time goes on, though, it takes intention and work to keep it fresh. The little things we once appreciated can get lost in the busyness and challenges of life.

We can know the practicalities of one another’s lives, their daily or weekly schedule, the foods they do and don’t like, etc., but actually lose sight of our partner’s emotional needs and dreams. It’s these deeper areas that help us to truly know one another. If you don’t really know someone, how can you truly be a friend or love them?

The good news is God showed us the way to be a good friend. Even though we were alienated from Him, He demonstrated His love for us by making the first move. We are friends with God because He took a chance on us. He risked rejection because He knew the reward of a deep, intimate, and loving friendship was worth the risk.

Romans 5:11 says because of His actions, we now rejoice in our wonderful new relationship. I want to encourage you today to make the first move. Ask a question, and dig deeper into the life and mind of your spouse. Take a deeper interest.

Reflection

1. Express to your spouse something you appreciate about them.
2. Acknowledge the little things they do to engage with you.
3. Thank God that He has brought you this far together, and commit your future plans to Him.