Women On The Frontlines: A Call To The Secret PlaceIhe Atụ

The Depths of God

Intimacy with God…hmm…sounds romantic, doesn’t it? But our God is holy and His holiness is a consuming fire. He draws us closer to Himself by kindling a fire that draws us like moths out of the darkness toward its great light. Drawn by a force that’s beyond ourselves, we come closer.

As we get closer, the fire of God begins to make us uncomfortable. The light of His holiness begins to scorch the dross and the chaff within us. We experience turmoil as we become painfully aware of our sins, shortcomings, and unworthiness to be in His beautiful, holy presence. We become painfully aware that we have become idolaters, nurturing false passions of our soul and flesh, and that our idols have kept us trapped in worldliness.

Our turmoil grows deeper and stronger until it becomes a battle over our very souls. We long for Him and we remember the seal of the Holy Spirit, like the engagement ring pledged as a promise of a coming wedding day. Yet at the same time we are overwhelmed with our failings, angers, jealousies, and lusts. Within, we cry out, How could He possibly love me or want me as I am?

Oh, but our heavenly Lover already sees and knows everything. Fully aware of our every fault, He nevertheless calls us to Himself. Unfortunately, our sense of unworthiness causes us to resist Him and hold back from running into His arms with abandonment.

So, we hang onto our worldly passions, interests, positions, power, possessions, people—all in an attempt to anchor ourselves here on earth, where we feel a little more secure. We worry, What will He ask of me? What will He force me to give up? We attempt to bargain our way out of our perceived losses. What will He let me keep?

Sooner or later, we look up. Who is this Man standing before us? It’s Jesus! His heart calls us tenderly, Just let go of your struggle. Let it go…and come to Me!

What am I waiting for? we ask. Letting go of all fear and resistance, we run headlong into His arms. Instantly, the Holy Spirit breathes upon the embers of our smoldering passion, setting our hearts ablaze with love for Him.