Does Forgiving Make You a Doormat? Ihe Atụ

When You Have to Forgive Again and Again

In Matthew 18:21, Peter asks Jesus, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?”

I’m sure Peter expected Jesus to say something like, “Wow, Peter, you’re willing to forgive somebody seven times? That is so mature!”

But Jesus said, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven” (v. 22). Yikes! Jesus is telling Peter to forgive someone 490 times per day! But I don’t think Jesus meant that on 491st time it would be okay to stop forgiving and hold a grudge. What He’s really saying is that we must forgive every time. He never wants us to be in bondage to unforgiveness.

So that means we might just have to forgive someone multiple times, even in the same day. We might live with this person, or work with them, or have them as a permanent fixture in our lives. But if the Bible says to do it, we can do it! Ephesians 6:10 says “be strong in the Lord and in the power of his might” — not yours. He is standing by, ready to help when we cry, “Father, help me forgive them again!”

Now, remember you don’t have to continually put yourself in a position to be wronged or harmed. But when we do things God’s way by forgiving, we can expect a supernatural outcome and receive peace and freedom.

One lady listened to my CD series on forgiveness and sent me this message: “There's been a person I see continually who’s often saying and doing hurtful things to me. I know it's not intentional because hurting people hurt people, but I realized I was still holding on to hurt, and that’s unforgiveness. So I forgave right there in my car. As a result, I started sleeping again, which hasn't happened in months. Nothing has changed in the natural, she’s still treating me the same. But I am different! I’m free! I'm able to show God's love to her instead of feeling hurt all the time.”

No matter how many times you have to forgive in a day, it’s always the right thing to do. It doesn’t make you a doormat. It brings God into the situation, which always brings freedom in your life.