Build a Better Marriage by Building a Biblical PerspectiveSample

The Bible is clear that we are called to steward our thought life. When we submit our thinking to what is good, right and true, we can truly change our minds! Science confirms this: Our brain is literally shaped by our thought patterns. Neuroplasticity is a term referring to the fact that changing our thought patterns can reshape our minds. When Proverbs 4:23 tells us to “guard your heart,” “heart” refers to our inner being and inner life. Because the thoughts you meditate on become the beliefs and behaviors that shape you, inside and out, guarding your inner thought life is an essential part of obeying this directive.

As 2 Corinthians 10:5 demonstrates, we are not at the mercy of the thoughts that pop into our minds – even though it can often feel that way since our frequent thoughts become habits. It is easier to remain in a well-established pattern than to think in a new way, but the practice of stewarding our thoughts is a God-given direction that is life-giving and healthy.

Proverbs 18 says our spouse is a “gift from God.” Do you view them as a gift? Pray for eyes to see your spouse as God sees them. There is no perfect person. If you were married to anyone else, they would have their own set of flaws and struggles. Rather than comparing your marriage or your spouse to someone else, choose what you focus on. We see more of what we’re looking for.

Questions for you:

1. What are the top 10 adjectives you would use to describe your spouse and your marriage?
2. Looking at the list of adjectives, are they true? Are they fair? Are they helpful?
3. For any that are negative, what are they based on? Have you made any unhelpful assumptions?
4. Make a list of 5 ways your spouse is a gift to you.