From Grumbling to Gratitude...Escaping Self-Pity's Snareনমুনা

Honor: “I’m Taken For Granted”

You know your self-pity is bad when you boycott a party to seek attention.

The older brother in Jesus’ parable of the prodigal son in Luke 15 is fictional but relatable. During his deadbeat brother’s welcome feast, he’s outraged and refuses to join. He grumbles about injustice. All my years of obedient hard work, and HE gets the gala? What am I, invisible?

He craves appreciation. His father points out that the younger brother has only wasted his own inheritance; the eldest will still gain the whole estate. So why is he complaining about not getting a roast goat with friends? Likely, he wants to hear Dad publicly proclaim, “You are the good son. You, not your brother, deserve a banquet.”

While feeling taken for granted, he takes his father for granted. Like his younger brother, this son wants a party with his friends, not his father. By throwing an outdoor pity party during the feast, he shames the father. But as the merciful father ran out to meet the wayward younger son, he personally invited the self-righteous firstborn into the feast.

The parable doesn’t tell us the son’s response. It leaves room for the listening Pharisees to decide whether to join Jesus with society’s lowlifes. It leaves room for us. Will we sullenly insist we’re right, demanding recognition? Or, acknowledging our shortcomings, can we marvel at being summoned to the ultimate gala?

Tim Keller contrasts Jesus as a truly good firstborn son. He obeyed his Father, not grudgingly, but lovingly. Rather than resenting us, his rebellious younger siblings, he humbly left home to pursue us. To the public’s shock, he invited himself into the home of Zacchaeus, a reviled tax collector. He bore the Father’s wrath “to seek and save the lost.”

When we recognize the Father’s mercy to both sons as his mercy to us, self-pity gives way to grateful awe. Christ endured the cross to restore our status as God’s children, share his glory, and make us co-heirs. God’s presence brings us true joy. Now we have the honor of joining him to invite others into his family.

Prayer: Father, when I do the right thing, I want human recognition. Let your undeserved approval be enough for me. Thank you for welcoming me into your banquet. May my life compel people around me to celebrate you, not me.