From Grumbling to Gratitude...Escaping Self-Pity's Snareনমুনা

Ability: “This Is Too Hard”

In the year since I moved to a small Cambodian town – something I’d vowed to avoid while single – the rough days have found me criticizing God. “Serving here is too lonely, too stressful. I told you I’m not cut out for this!”

I’m like Moses, insisting he’s the wrong person to rescue the Israelites. Five times, he expressed questions or doubts. He wasn’t a good speaker; who would listen?

God responded with seven verbal assurances of his presence and help, displaying three miraculous signs. Seven and three: biblical numbers of perfection and completion. God promised his plan would prevail over human stubbornness. Yet Moses concluded with, “Please send someone else,” provoking God’s anger.

Poor Moses. He was just too humble. Or was he? His low self-esteem was actually pride. He was focused on himself, not on God. Moses didn’t request God’s help or favor. Self-pity deluded him that his deficient speaking skills would derail God’s plan and nullify God’s promises.

But it wasn’t about Moses. Even Pharaoh later asked, “Who is the Lord?” (Exodus 4:2) He acknowledged the power struggle between Egypt and Israel as a test of God, not Moses.

Though angry, God was gracious and patient with Moses. He accompanied, taught, and used Moses. Amid doubt and defiance, God enabled Moses to lead Israel into the promised land. Moses’ final words in Deuteronomy 33 celebrated decades of God faithfully carrying Israel in his “everlasting arms.” Gratitude replaced self-pity; the two can never coexist.

Moses’ reluctant leadership foreshadowed a greater rescuer with an infinitely harder task. Like Moses, Jesus asked his Father to spare him: "Please take this cup away.” Surely his dread surpassed Moses’ as he anticipated the unbearable — separation from the Father. Yet Jesus showed his power to overcome self-pity, submitting to the Father: “Not my will, but yours be done.”

At the cross, Jesus did what we never could: He opened our way into God’s presence, the ultimate Promised Land. If Moses had reasons for gratitude, how much more do we! Now, Christ invites us to take up his yoke. He promises we’ll find it easy – not because we’re able, but because he walks beside us.

Prayer: Lord, when I am weak, you are strong. Thank you for rescuing me and bringing me into your kingdom. Help me trust your boundless ability, empowering me to participate in your work.