The Man You Were Made to BeНамуна

Family

You’ve probably got framed family photos in your home or office. But photos of smiling people on holiday never give the full picture of any family, right? What if, instead, we dared to be real about our deficiencies as family men and the challenges our families face? And what if we dared to put our hope in God’s plans for our families?

I’ve realized I can quantify the hours I put into my job, but I can never quantify how well I’m doing as a dad, grandad, or husband. I asked my family one night over dinner, ‘What do you think the most important thing about family is?’ My daughter replied, ‘We need to remember that the other people in the family are actually people themselves, not just roles in relation to me.’ Wow! Selfishly, we all sometimes ignore the unique, broader identities of the people in our families.

In Mark 8:22–26, Jesus leads a blind man out of the village, away from the crowds. He gives the man His undivided attention and takes time to talk and pray with him. The man’s healing unfolds over a deliberate, unhurried interaction. Jesus isn’t satisfied to do half a job. He wants the blind man to see other people as people (not trees!). Unrushed, He prays a second time. Jesus wants to touch our eyes too, so we see people as they really are, especially those closest to us. What blurs your vision when it comes to those you love best? What are the biggest distractions keeping you from prioritising your family? Slow down. You can’t love in a rush.

Family was God’s idea. After He’d created the earth and the man, He called them good. What was not good was the man being alone (Genesis 1:31, 2:18). We’re viscerally designed for connection. God created a companion for Adam, but Adam and Eve weren’t the perfect couple. Genesis reads like a tabloid: so much dysfunction! Still, God never gave up on that first family. He’s not giving up on your family either.

Jesus stepped onto the pages of history to welcome us into the family of a perfect Father. God isn’t in denial about the imperfections of every earthly family. Still, He invites us into His family, and He’s unchanging in His promise, unstoppable in power, and perfect in love. We don’t need to gloss over the struggles and quirks of our families, because God certainly doesn’t.

It’s not too late for you to make the changes you need to make in your family. Ask God to start with you. Your schedule needs to show your family that you love and prioritise them, and the time to start showing them is today. Whatever your relational past or present, you have a Heavenly Father from whom every earthly family derives its name (Ephesians 3:15). God knows no family is perfect, but He delights in miracles, and in Him, your family future is bright.