7 Days of Prayer to Prepare for MarriageНамуна

One of my biggest challenges from a young age has been a quick temper. I used to get angry easily when watching my favorite teams on TV. And when I work too much and don’t get enough sleep, I become quick to get angry at coworkers, friends, and even my family. I know I’m not alone; I see this tendency toward anger in many other Christians.

James gave us a great challenge—­that we would be “slow to become angry” (1:19). A person who is slow to become angry is much more pleasant to be with and typically makes for a better spouse. James also explained that intense, sustained anger doesn’t help us become more like Christ, and it doesn’t make us more righteous.

One of the challenges you and your significant other will face in marriage is unmet expectations. Sometimes you’ll be unaware that you have expectations of your spouse, and you may become frustrated when your spouse doesn’t act the way you want them to. Other times your expectations will be known to yourself but unspoken, and you may get frustrated with your spouse when you hold them to an expectation they’re unaware of. And at other times, your expectations will be completely unrealistic. When your spouse doesn’t live up to these unrealistic expectations, you may get angry with them.

How can you become a spouse who is slow to anger?

Ask God to help you become more patient. Ask Him to lengthen your patience and help you be slow to anger.

Memorize Bible verses about patience. The Bible is filled with verses about becoming slow to anger (Prov. 14:29; 15:1; 19:11; Eph. 4:26; James 1:19–20).

Follow God’s example. Take note of how God is slow to anger and abounding in love (Exod. 34:6; Ps. 103:8; 145:8). Become more like the Lord, and He’ll take care of the rest!

God, it’s so easy at times for many of us to lose our temper. We tend to get frustrated when things don’t go our way, we hold our partner to standards we don’t keep ourselves, and we can take our internal frustrations out on others. Help us to become slow to anger. Help us to let go of unrealistic expectations and learn to be patient, understanding, and gracious when things don’t go our way. We pray our relationship will be one marked by patience and understanding.