Hope After Loss - Leaning on God After Losing a Loved One to AddictionНамуна

How Do I Ever Get Through This?

Our loved one is gone. We lost a person who we adored. We lost the hard-fought battle with addiction. And we lost an entire lifetime of dreams, wishes, plans, and hopes.

The day my 21-year-old daughter Lexi left this earth was the worst day of my life and the beginning of the hardest time in my life. How could it be that I would never see her beautiful big brown eyes again, never laugh with her again? So much of my time, energy, and prayer had gone into trying to help her. Now there was a gigantic hole.

I felt I had failed. The pain was a heavy weight in my soul every hour of every day. I felt like the psalmist in Psalm 42 who says, ”My tears have been my food day and night.” I sure can relate to that sorrowful psalm.

But… the psalmist doesn’t stay lost in his tears. He begins preaching to himself: “Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise Him, my salvation and my God.”

Rather than letting himself spiral into darkness, the writer of the psalm stops himself in his tracks and redirects his mind. He looks back to remember the times of blessing, and reminds himself of God’s steadfast love throughout his entire life.

How easy it is during times of trial to let our minds fall into believing lies? “A good God would not have let this happen." "If God loved me, He wouldn’t let me suffer like this." "God has abandoned me.” Or worse yet, “God clearly doesn’t exist.”

How easy it is to be led by our fluctuating emotions:

"I can’t endure this pain; this is too much."
"It will never end; there is nothing to live for anymore."
"I can’t go on."
"No one understands and I am totally alone."
"There is no hope."

This is when we must begin preaching to ourselves. Our emotions are not reliable and cannot be trusted.

God created us, He loves us, and He is always there with us, even when we don’t feel it.

He promises He has a plan for our lives, even for this suffering, even for this pain. Like the psalmist, we must determine to put our hope in Him.

How can we do this?

We must keep pouring truths into our souls. We can do that by committing to spending time in the Bible, filling our minds with His promises and His love.

We can flood our minds with worship music and spiritual songs, which keep us aware of His presence and provision.

Attending church and sitting under the preaching of God’s Word gives us grace and strength to cope each week.

Spending time in prayer allows God to speak directly to our hearts.

And, just like the psalmist, we have to intentionally focus on gratitude, looking through the cloud of grief to the many blessings that surround us. It’s been proven that gratitude releases dopamine and serotonin in our brains, which positively impact mood and motivation. When we redirect our minds towards holy truths (which is an ongoing process), we combat the enemy and keep his lies from seeping into our hearts and totally deflating us. When we determine to set our minds on God, He will provide us with hope.

Today’s Challenge:
Preach to yourself. Be intentional about pouring truths into your soul. How will you make time for God’s word this week? When thoughts start to turn negative, look for things to be thankful for. Determine to put your hope in God.

Prayer:

Lord, my heart aches with the pain of loss. But I WILL put my hope in you. Even though it doesn’t seem possible, I will keep leaning on you, knowing that your promises are true. Thank you for your constant and faithful love in the midst of my pain. You are the God of my life.