Receiving Grace and ForgivingНамуна

Day 2 – Forgiveness is never deserved

REFLECTIONS

Forgiveness is never deserved, it is a gift from God.

Read Matthew 18:21-22 and Romans 5:8 and take a moment to answer the following questions:

➤ How many times must we forgive someone who has offended us?

 ➤ What conclusions can you draw from this?

- ➤ Did Jesus wait until we deserved forgiveness?

STUDY

Forgiveness is something which is difficult, it costs and here Peter tries to calculate how much to forgive; “How often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?” What this means is ‘I am patient, but the eighth time I will choose to not forgive. Enough is enough and you mustn’t think that you can take advantage of me!’ This touches on an important aspect of forgiveness, that is that it isn’t about being taken advantage of. That being said, Jesus doesn’t give a limit to how much we should forgive. He replies, “seventy seven times seven times”, which in reality means an unlimited amount! On the other hand, He doesn’t say to stay close to those who offend and hurt us continually. I can only encourage you to forgive those people, but also to say that you must confront them, and if necessary, distance yourself from them to protect yourself.

You probably know the expression, “How can I forgive myself?” Often, people who are wrong try to appease their enemy or their friend by any means, as if the forgiveness they are asking for could be deserved or bought. This type of calculated and negotiated forgiveness isn’t true forgiveness. It leads to us staying accountable towards that person. It is for this reason that Jesus will clearly say that forgiveness in unconditional and without calculation.

Imagine a moment: if God had to calculate His forgiveness in regards to us, limiting Himself to our merits, we would never be able to be forgiven! If we were to try and pit our good works against our bad actions, including those that remain in our thoughts, it is clear that we could never benefit from His forgiveness. But God makes us an extraordinary promise in 1 John 1:9 “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.” It’s why when we approach God with a repentant heart, we have the assurance of being forgiven.

So we understand that each attempt to try and do things in our own strength to gain God’s forgiveness is doomed to fail. Religion pretends to prescribe rules to follow to try and gain the favour of God, whereas the life of discipleship – which is a personal relationship with the Holy Spirit – begins by recognising that we don’t deserve forgiveness and that it is the result of God’s Grace and His love. It is about knowing how to develop our intimacy with God and to cultivate our love for Him by getting rid of the human tendency of wanting to try and gain things by ourselves.

In Romans 5:8 we discover that Jesus did not wait for us to deserve it before providing forgiveness of our sins. He didn’t even wait until we recognised that we needed it. He chose to give His life for us so that we can, when we approach Him, receive His life and forgiveness.

Even though we don’t deserve this forgiveness, in contrast to the merits of Jesus’ life - His sinless life and His perfect obedience to the Father – we have a complete unconditional refund of the total debt. This redemption is the result of God’s love for us in action.

As a consequence, because God loved us so perfectly, as the apostle John puts it, we must also love one another (cf. 1 John 4:11). This also implies knowing how to forgive others who don’t deserve it or even ask for it. Because too often we have the tendency to want to wait for others to ask for forgiveness before we forgive them, when it should be us who forgives first of all – and that happens in the secrecy of our relationship with God. However, forgiveness is between myself and God, but the fact is the other person can ask for forgiveness and allow the restoration of the relationship, but that is dependant on their decision and the conscience of the other person and it is their responsibility. 

Let’s remember that God didn’t love us because we had done something to deserve it. Actually, we acted in the opposite manner, we turned our backs on Him, by despising Him, ignoring Him and making fun of Him. And God asks us to love our enemies (cf. Matthew 5:44), which starts by forgiving them. That is only possible in the measure where the love of God has touched our heart and that we have received the assurance that our own sins have been forgiven.

Take a moment to allow the Holy Spirit to search your heart, invite Him to show you if there are still people who you need to forgive, but also to reveal whether you have, without realising it, a religious attitude by trying to gain God’s forgiveness.

MY DECISION :

 ➤ What I have understood for my own personal life : 

 ➤ What I am deciding to do in my life based upon what I have just learnt :

 ➤ What you decide to do today will determine who and what you will be tomorrow !