All About Heaven - GriefНамуна

The death of one of Jesus’ closest friends, Lazarus, actually produced the shortest verse in the Bible. ‘When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled. “Where have you laid him?” They said to him, “Lord, come and see.” Jesus wept. So the Jews said, “See how he loved him!”’ (John 11:35)

Jesus had lost his own father sometime after the age of 12, exactly when we are not sure. With all the positive statements we have made, Jesus does not minimize the pain of grief. He does not whitewash over it, he can share in it intimately. And in this short story, with the shortest verse in the Bible, we get it. Jesus understands grief. He, more than anyone, knows that death is conquered, but it still leaves widows, orphans and bereaved parents behind. At the cross, there is a remarkable exchange where he makes preparation, and says to Mary ‘Behold, your son!’ and to John, ‘Behold, your mother!’ Whatever else was being set up, Jesus understood the importance of close, trustworthy support at a time of grief.

If you were to ask anyone who grieves the death of a loved one, one of the things they feel is that they grieve alone, that no one really understands them. That is often true on a human level, but the liberating truth is that in our deepest pain, in those ceaseless seeping tears or in a tsunami of grief, Jesus has been there and understands it.

Grief and love are woven together. Our grief is only so intense because of how intense the love was. One of Jacob’s friends said to him, you would have been better off if you’d had a dad who beat you and never loved you, but your dad was so wonderful, so loving and so creative with memories, you will miss him like mad.

Sorrow and grief are to be expected and, actually, welcomed. Really? Yes, if Jesus is to heal the broken-hearted, then expect tears. If he is to heal the crushed in Spirit, then expect tears. Tears can be either a symptom or a sign of grief without hope, or they can reflect real, deep, even unimaginable loss, and yet with hope and a certainty about both the destination of our loved one and the certainty of our own healing.