Navigating Teenage RebellionНамуна

Day 4: Do not Take it Personally!

I am ashamed to say that I was offended by my teens’ rebellion. This was arrogance and immaturity on my part. I took their choices as a personal affront. As much as I hate to admit it, I was embarrassed. I felt like a total failure of a mom. I had never wanted my kids to hang around “them.” You know, those kids who do those unacceptable things like illegal drugs. Now we were the “them” no one wanted to hang around. How very humbling! 

I had attempted to be a wise mom who set boundaries, but to my children, I was a Pharisee with judgment toward “those sinners.” This was a confusing time for all of us. The enemy stirred up a lot of strife in our home. My only solid ground was the Word of God and the hope I held in Him alone. 

As parents, it is hard not to take our children’s actions personally—but it only makes us look arrogant and selfish. We are not the center of the world. Our sin is no better than their sin. We must never throw stones at the sin of another sinner. The enemy wants us to be angry with our sinner children. Humility and compassion are our only recourse, and it is only by God’s strength and the power of the Holy Spirit that we can navigate this posture. Our teens come from parents who are sinners, and it is in their human nature to sin. This was such a growing time in my walk with the Lord. I had many, many personal times crying out to Him for wisdom. 

1 Corinthians 13 reminds us that love is not quick to point out sin, but to cover it. Love is humble, kind, and compassionate. It will take a fresh, moment-by-moment filling of the Holy Spirit to walk through these difficult years with the fruit of peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.