If He Wanted to He WouldSmakprov
He Wanted to, and He Did
You are wanted. You are pursued. You are seen. You are valued. Jesus saw you in your mess. He saw you without makeup on. He saw you in your vulnerability. And He still chose you. He said, "She's the one I want to have a relationship with. Not just for a season, but forever." Then He stepped out of heaven and put action behind His words. Ephesians 1:4 says, "Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes."
Let me ask you a question: what are you looking forward to most in a relationship/marriage? How do you want a man to treat you? Now, let me ask another question: Does Jesus make you feel that way? Do you have what you're looking for in your relationship with Christ?
If your answer is no, then I'd strongly encourage you to take time to be vulnerable with Jesus and allow Him to fill those intimate places in your heart. If your answer is yes, I encourage you to ask yourself if you trust God to fulfill His promise or if you've stuffed down your desire and pretended it doesn't exist. It's possible to be content with your life while also longing for the hope to come. It's possible to have faith in God for a miracle while also grateful for what you already have. There is a mystery of satisfaction in gratitude and revelation of the goodness of God. It's a sensation as if you already have the thing you long for.
Before finishing this devotional, I came across something I posted on Instagram nine months ago. I wrote, "I talk a lot about finding the joy/adventure in singleness, but that doesn't mean I don't have days when my own heart hurts. I recently went through a breakup that honestly was one of the hardest decisions of my life. But the most incredible thing I've experienced since then is the supernatural peace of God. His love and presence are my greatest rebound and I'm confident redemption is soon to follow. If you're going through a breakup or still getting over someone you once loved, I'm praying you experience this too. The goodness of God CAN be trusted. This isn't how our story ends."
So I tell you, friend, no matter where you are on the spectrum of navigating how to be pursued or wishing someone would pursue you, this isn't how your story ends. Your journey is not defined by finding someone worthy of your attention because you already have the attention of heaven. Your journey is your own, and you get to decide the standard you will uphold to use your time in singleness. Raise that standard high, allow Jesus to redefine it, feel the pursuit of heaven, step into your calling, arise to the greatness within you, treat yourself with love and respect, and, by golly, laugh and cry your way through all the heartache, pain, and suffering to reach the other side of absolute ridiculous hope!
Nine months later, after writing those words, I am a living testimony of redemption. On February 14th, I met an incredible man who pursued me like a man on a mission! Yes, on Valentine's Day, aka singleness awareness day, when singles often feel the most unseen and aching in their heart to be loved. It also happened to be the day my book 'Single Shouldn't Suck' was released after nine years of writing it, but that's another story. God is incredibly cheesy and so so good. He knows, He sees, He pursues. He wants to fulfill every promise for you NOW. Maybe not the way you've dreamed up within your expectations, but in His way far beyond our imagination.
So, where will you go from here? Will you continue spiraling into toxic love patterns, swiping left and right to fill your empty insatiable desire to be pursued? Or will you give your heart time to heal and sit in the waiting and pain long enough to feel the pursuit of heaven? Will you keep making excuses for that guy that you swear is 'the one,' or will you surrender it fully to God and let Him work beyond your ability to control?
I know it's not easy, but you weren't created for easy. You deserve to be fought for and a love so great it can withstand the test of time and endurance to win your heart. Give your heart the fighting chance it deserves. Don't settle for minimal effort. Don't diminish your value. Don't fall in love with a fantasy. Don't give in to the trap of false promises. That's not the narrative of a love story worthy of shouting from the rooftops. Turn the page and start living like the main character of a truly amazing adventure with God at the center of your heart's desire.
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For more from the author, check out her books/resources at Esthermarie.org & @esthermariecottle or read my other plans here
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Have you ever found yourself in a 'situationship' offering a million excuses to justify the minimal effort from a guy 'pursuing' you? Yeah, me too. I've found this pattern to be all too common amongst women who've settled for less than they deserve. You are WORTHY of a committed relationship, but how do you break the cycle of toxic love patterns and finally experience godly pursuit?
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