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How to Love Your Enemies

Talking about enemies might sound childish, military, political, or overly dramatic. We don’t often use the word ‘enemy’ at the office water cooler or when we’re out for dinner with friends. And yet, enemies are an unavoidable part of our human experience. Jesus never questioned whether we had enemies. He assumed we did (Luke 6:27), and He challenged us not only to face our enemies but also to love them.

Interestingly, in Luke 6:26 Jesus implies that worse than having enemies is having no enemies at all. Pleasing everyone is impossible – and dangerous. The truth is, I don’t mind people rejecting me because of Jesus, but I don’t want anyone to reject Jesus because of me. Life’s too short to make enemies about things that don’t matter, but life’s too important to live in fear of ever making an enemy. We just need to get comfortable with turning the other cheek: a dignified way of acknowledging the hurt caused while graciously showing your commitment to fight for reconciliation. It’s a way of elevating – going high when your enemy goes low. This is way healthier than retaliating, escalating, or evacuating.

Paul writes, ‘If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.’ (Romans 12:18) If there’s someone in your life with whom it has proven impossible to live harmoniously, think about what it might look like, as far as it depends on you, to relate to that person in a peace-loving, dignified, kind, and honouring way. Maybe you just need to start by praying for them. When I was advised to pray for an enemy, the results were transformative (even though of course I didn’t feel like praying initially!).

Thankfully, Jesus didn’t just sprout pithy sayings like, ‘Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.’ (Luke 6:36) He actually lived everything He taught. Jesus showed unthinkable kindness to His enemies. Amidst the mayhem of being mobbed and arrested in the Garden of Gethsemane, He healed the sliced-off ear of Malchus, the High Priest’s slave (John 18:10-11, Luke 22:51). In excruciating agony, He prayed for those who had driven the nails into His hands and feet (Luke 23:34). Jesus gave His life to turn His enemies into friends.

God wouldn’t tell us to love and pray for our enemies if it wasn’t possible in His strength. Ask God to soften your heart, and to help you see your enemy the way He does. Trust Him for the courage it will cost you to show the kind of mercy that ushers in miracles.