Good Grief: Living and Learning Through Loss a 7-Day Plan by Maya J.T. DawsonChikamu

Day 2: Confronting Denial

During grief counseling I was introduced to the phrase “new normal.” This phrase seemed like an oxymoron. How could something “new” be considered “normal?” And what is normal about living the rest of life on earth without your loved one physically present? When questions like these arise, denial almost seems like a safe haven. It can be hard to admit that someone is no longer living.

Confronting denial is painful. It’s like opening the blinds to a dark room in the middle of the day. It can be blinding and definitely takes some getting used to. Hence, the phrase “new normal.” Confronting denial means acknowledging that something has changed and will no longer be the same. Confronting denial means making room to experience God in a different way.

God in His sovereignty sent the Holy Spirit, the Ultimate Comforter, to dwell with us. He knew we would need someone to help us navigate through the highs and lows of life one step at a time. When we invite the Holy Spirit into our daily lives, we begin to truly experience God’s comfort. He consoles us and envelopes us with His loving presence. He reminds us of His word which sustains us from day to day.

Apart from salvation, our greatest promise from God is that He will never leave nor forsake us. As followers of Jesus Christ, we can withstand anything life throws at us because we know that God is with us. God’s comfort doesn’t change our reality, but it does give us the courage to face it. I’m learning that on the other side of denial is a life that may look and feel different, but it can be beautiful nonetheless. As you grieve, God is reaching out to you. Will you take His hand?

“…to comfort all who mourn,

and provide for those who grieve in Zion –

to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes,

the oil of joy instead of mourning,

and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.”

Isaiah 61:2-3 (NIV)

“And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, to be with you forever…The Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, He will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you.”

John 14:16, 26 (ESV)

“For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Romans 8:38-39 (ESV)