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Day 11: Emotion

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We love each other because he loved us first. –1 John 4:19

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Jesus frequently expressed emotion.

Once, He used a whip to drive merchants out of the temple. He even flipped tables. Fueled by His passion for protecting His Father’s house, He expressed righteous anger.

And after His friend Lazarus died, Jesus wept. He already knew He would bring Lazarus back to life, but He cried because of the tremendous sorrow he felt for Mary and others, as they wept at His feet.

In an olive grove called Gethsemane, right before His arrest, Jesus told His disciples how He truly felt. “My soul is crushed with grief,” He said (Matthew 26:38).

Jesus wasn’t afraid to express His emotions—and He wasn’t uncomfortable witnessing other people’s emotions.

Are you?

It isn’t always easy to express your emotions or to observe someone else’s, but healthy, intimate relationships create opportunities to do both.

In fact, marriage is intended to be a space that’s safe for that, a place where on good days and bad, both spouses can express their feelings respectfully and without fear.

Marriage vows will call your spouse to value and embrace all of you—including your emotions. And matrimony involves loving each other as God loves us.

He loves you no differently on your worst days than on your best.

He didn’t design you to stifle or run from feelings, whether your own or someone else’s.

You’re designed to express feelings in healthy ways and to empathize with others when they express theirs.

In every relationship, there will be anger, confusion, joy, and even sorrow. A significant other’s response to your emotions is good information for you. How you respond to somebody else’s emotions is good information, too.

And how God responds to your feelings says something just as important—that His love for you is infinite.

Pray

Thank You, Father, for valuing all of me, including my emotions. I know it isn’t always easy to express some of my feelings, and sometimes it stretches me to watch someone else express theirs. Please open my heart to creating a safe place for significant others and their emotions—and provide me with a community of others who can do the same.

Reflect

What feelings have you been afraid to express in front of a significant other—joy, anger, sadness, fear? What do you worry will happen if you’re happy, mad, sad, or anxious in front of him or her? What is your default response to other people’s emotions? Should your response change in any way?