Strategy 2: Connecting in the Car

Studies suggest that parents in the U.S. spend between 40 to 60 minutes per day driving with their children, primarily for school drop-offs, pick-ups, after-school activities, and errands.

If you're thinking about longer car trips, such as vacations or weekend outings, that number can increase significantly. How are we stewarding that time?

A typical response is with one of two extremes - silence or noise. Noise often looks like music, podcasts, audible books, and the like. While the noise in itself may be uplifting and inspirational, thank you K-Love, there is an alternative perspective that is worth considering. That is the idea of opportunity cost.

If that is a new term here is a general understanding of the term. Opportunity cost refers to the value of the next best alternative that is forgotten when a decision is made. In other words, it's the cost of what you give up when you choose one option over another. Often it is used in financial terms yet there is great value in considering it regarding the utilization of time in the vehicle.

In this context, what opportunity is being lost that we should be fighting for? It is the opportunity to connect and speak life into your family members' lives. Every trip, especially the most mundane, are potential catalyst for connection. Imaging a scenario where the first action taken when starting on a morning carpool routine is for family prayer time being conducted. I experienced this firsthand for multiple years during the morning carpool run.

The thought occurred that since the carpool routine would take roughly 20 minutes, and since we always seemed to be running behind, why not shift the dynamic up and add prayer into the equation? At first, it was awkward, yet over time it became a natural mode of operation.

A unique part of the dynamic we created was that the children prayed out loud and it was always great to hear what was on their hearts. Another incredible result was the reframe it gave me as the parent regarding the process in its entirety. I can’t say that I ever woke up and thought, “Oh boy I get to go to carpool today”, but I did look forward to the meaningful connection we had each morning and how the relationship with my daughters blossomed by this step of intentionality.

Be it carpooling, a ride to the grocery store, or heading to a sports practice each time you find yourself in a vehicle with your family, view it as an opportunity. An opportunity to connect, an opportunity to laugh, an opportunity to cry, and an opportunity to grow closer together. Take advantage of the captive audience that is at your disposal and push back against the evil one on every trip you take!

Questions to Consider:

1. How can you use the time spent driving with your children as an opportunity to intentionally connect and strengthen your relationship?
2. In what ways could you reframe your perspective on daily carpool or errands to see them as valuable opportunities to speak life into your children?