In the Garden With Jesus - a Lent Journey for TeensSample

Jesus’ life: loneliness

The cup Jesus had to drink is a lot of things, but firstly it’s Jesus’ extradition to the darkest place of human existence: rejection, loneliness, humiliation and helplessness.

Henri Nouwen, a famous writer, writes in one of his books about the loss of his mother. A woman of faith and love, compassion… she walked with God throughout her life. He writes about her last moments before death, and the story gripped me.

He writes how she was surrounded by friends and family, her loved ones, and with modern medicine, she should have, in our understanding, been able to die without any pain or struggle. But he writes about her inner struggle. A struggle of the soul. Not because she was in pain, but because she felt abandoned. Felt like the God to whom she had dedicated her life, had abandoned her.

Her last moments were filled with doubt, anxiety, sadness, loneliness. The comfort, hope, love, and peace of God she had known her whole life felt to her like it didn’t exist. In those moments, when she needed God’s presence the most, she felt like He didn’t exist. Nouwen found himself in a place where he asked himself: why, God? Where are You? How can You hide from someone who loves You so much and follows You? How can You desert her?

The answer came to him later. His mother had prayed to live like Jesus and to die like Jesus… Doesn’t it make sense then that she, like Jesus, would have to drink the cup of loneliness?

In my mess, loneliness, turning away from You

I come with my broken consciousness and return

Lonely Jesus

Share my grief, desolation, my dust

~ K. van der Merwe

Prayer:

I ask for a deep consciousness of Your love and work in my life.