The Manhood Talks | Foundation & IdentitySample

Day 6 | Genesis 2:18-24 | Made for Others

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Welcome back to manhood talks. TeDese back with you again. Today — the most difficult topic in all of manhood: woman. What is it about women that makes men so… confused?

We left off in Genesis 2 with Adam in the garden of Eden. He had work, he had free will, but so far he doesn’t have … anyone else! And check out what God says about it in verse 18:

"The Lord God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him'" (Genesis 2:18).

This is the first time that God called anything, not good. Loneliness. Man was not meant to be alone. So God makes plans, for gift number 3. And as with all gifts, the best is saved for last.

God calls this gift “a helper.” Now don’t misunderstand. Helper does not mean subservient. It is not slave, nor minion nor henchman.

Helper. Of all the things you can give someone, help is a beautiful gift. And to be a helper throughout all of life… is something powerful. The Bible never uses the term helper to indicate a position of less value or lower standing. That’s a man-made concept. In fact, the Holy Spirit — God Himself — is called Helper. Think about that. This role and this title is something that God calls himself. So whoever this helper is for Adam is going to be something — or someone — also made in God's image.

In verse 19, the Lord leads Adam through a process of naming all of the animals, but none of them are fit to be the helper. Now it’s not as though God thought maybe one of these would work. This was for Adam’s sake, because the process matters — waiting for the right one matters. Which for Adam meant not marrying a rhinoceros. Good choice Adam.

Verse 21:

"So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man" (Genesis 2:21-22).

That’s an interesting change of method. God made woman not from the dirt — but from Adam’s own flesh and bone.

Now, I have heard some teach that since the woman came from the man, that men are superior. It’s rather shortsighted, because 1st Corinthians 11 reminds us that after the one woman came from the body of a man — every man since has come from the body of a woman. So if that’s superiority — then your mom wins.

Though it may seem politically incorrect, I say my mother out-fathered my father, and maternal grandmother out fathered my maternal grandfather. I refuse to let my wife out father me. I do not think that emotions are gender specific, but how we relate, model and display those emotions can be gender-influenced.

Don’t misunderstand me — the Bible will later call men to lead their families — but lead as servants, not as superior. We'll get into that later.

For now, look back at Adam’s response in Genesis 2. It’s not about inequality — it’s about unity. Verse 23:

"'The man said, 'This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man'" (Genesis 2:23).

Adam’s first words to Eve provide one of the most elegant and most beautiful verses of romantic love in all of literature. My bones and my flesh. She is part of me, and I am part of her.

See God did not give Eve to Adam the way one gives an object or toy. She was the greatest blessing to Adam — and he to her. Do not underestimate the honor and privilege it is to be a blessing from God to another person. Now Adam’s work has a purpose, and his will has a purpose — outside of himself — that gives meaning and joy and fulfillment.

Imagine if the woman were simply made for herself, and the man for himself. They got along okay, but ultimately life was about self. Do you know how miserable that would be? That would be … well, sadly it would be a lot like life today for far too many marriages.

Which brings me to another essential element of man’s character. We have seen faith, strength, and courage, but for this new relationship, those will not be enough. For this new bride, Adam must learn to love.

Again we have a word that has been badly redefined. In the world, love is a feeling I get when I’m around her. Which is really just about me. I love how she makes me feel.

But love in the Bible is much deeper. Love is about unity, commitment, and sacrifice — laying down my feelings, my ambitions, my life —for the sake of someone else.

And that helps us understand this idea of helper. It's not about one person being subservient or lesser than another. It's about loving each other by serving one another. Jesus taught us that the greatest one among us is the one who serves, and He himself came to serve. And like I said earlier, the Holy Spirit is called the Helper. So if Jesus serves, and the Holy Spirit serves, what does that say about us who are made in God's image?

For Thought & Discussion:

Question 1: What role do women play in your identity as a man?

Question 2: What is true love? How do you think God defines it?

Read Genesis 2:18-24

All verses are quoted from NIV.