The Manhood Talks | Foundation & IdentitySample

Day 14 | Romans 12:1-2 | Do Not Conform

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Hello gentlemen. Welcome back to The Manhood Talks, TeDese back with you again. Today we return to subject of identity. How do you figure out who you are? And if we’re all being remade in God’s image — and all trying to be more like Jesus — does that mean that we’re all supposed to be the same?

I call this idea cookie-cutter Christianity. Basically, some people seem to think that Christians should all fit into the same mold: same style, same music, same whatever. But is that really what God wants?

Think about it. God created diversity. Why would His Kingdom be monochrome? Why would he make us different just to shove us back into one-mold-fits-all?

The Bible describes Heaven as a place with people from every tongue, every tribe, and every nation. And there is no indication that God removes the glorious cultural diversity that goes with that. Variety is awesome! And blending cultures is one of my favorite things about church! I love meeting people who are very different from me and knowing that they are my family! Why would we erase that?

And I’m sorry to say that the Christian church has gotten this wrong too many times. But that verse that says “there is no Gentile or Jew… barbarian or Scythian” is about removing divisions — not removing cultural identity.

God’s kingdom is like a tapestry, each individual thread retains the specific beauty that God bestowed it with, and when interwoven and combined with the other threads, it forms a radiant and awe-inspiring picture, that no single thread would be able to produce alone.

So if uniformity isn’t God’s plan, then what does it mean that we are all called to be like Jesus — reformed in His image? To find the answer, we turn today to Romans 12. Let’s read at verse 1:

“Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.” (Romans 12:1)

That is a powerful verse. And it basically means — Jesus died for you — so you live for Him. And then check out verse 2:

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind” (Romans 12:2).

Catch that. God does not want us to conform. That means don’t squeeze into a mold. And out in the world, that’s basically how most of us tried to find our identity. Try on different styles and trends until I find… me. But here’s the thing. All of that is trying to find your identity from the outside in.

And sometimes we we act like the word “Christian” is just one more label — one more outfit to try on and see if that's me. After all, Christian is a label on Spotify — so maybe that's all it is — just another label.

Listen, Christian is not a genre of music, and it is not another label for you to try on and see if it fits.

More importantly, trying to be godly from the outside-in is a recipe for hypocrisy. The Bible says in 1st Samuel 16:

“The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7).

So look back in Romans 12: Do not conform, “but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”

In other words — no cookie cutter. Stop trying to fit into a mold. Don't conform, transform.

So what does it mean to transform? Well, it means letting God change you on the inside — renewing your mind and your heart — and just let that work it’s way out naturally. Your clothes and your hair and your music might be affected — but not to conform to some image. And you’re style might be hip-hop or k-pop or nerd-hop — but none of those things define you.

Listen —the world will stand up and applaud you when you break stereotypes — if you’re the big kid who quit football to pursue dance, or the pretty girl who quit cheer to join the nerd club. Hey that’s awesome - break the stereotypes, buck the labels. But don’t let the applause fool you into thinking that you found you by trading in one label for another one, or by switching cookie-cutters. That’s still not transformation. And don’t just be defined as the guy who broke the stereotype. The real you is deeper than any style or clique or reputation.

Transform by the renewing of your mind. You think different, you believe different. You treat people different. You fix your eyes on Jesus. Not on His style — on His character, His compassion.

And what does that look like? Read the rest of Romans 12. It’s awesome. It starts with an honest look at yourself — sober judgment. Recognize that God gives us each our gifts — not to make one better than another — but so we can serve each other. And in verse 9, love sincerely. Be genuine. Hate evil, cling too good. Honor others — above yourself! Be joyful, patient, faithful. Share and show hospitality. Bless people who are terrible to you. Associate with lowly people. No arrogance. Don’t repay evil for evil — overcome evil with good. Live at peace. Love your enemy.

Seriously, this chapter describes an insanely awesome way to live. And you cannot make that happen — from the outside in. It only works by transformation. Let God renew your mind.

And you know what living like that means? It means — no shame. Just like the Garden. (Only now we’re not naked — thankfully). Romans 10 says anyone who believe in Jesus will never be put to shame.

God’s plan for us is restoration — back to the place where we can stand firm in our identity, where nothing can put us to shame.

It’s important to clarify here. God’s plan — is a life of no shame. But that does not mean — you can do bad things and not feel ashamed about it. It means you stop doing bad. It means God forgives your past and heals your future — so you have nothing to be ashamed of.

Read Romans 12 — I love this chapter. And in your journal, I want to write down again — your identity. Only this time, no three columns. Who cares how others see you. This time just write down how God sees you — in Christ. Write things like: son, worth dying for, forgiven, eternal — and write the stuff that’s personal to just you as well. And whatever you write — when it’s all done, write the words: Righteous in God’s sight. No more shame.

And remember — tomorrow is the group meeting. We'll see you there!

Read Romans 12:1-2

All verses are quoted from the NIV