Theology for Everybody: RomansSample

In our day of social media and technology, it is infinitely easier to make a point than to make a difference. Making a point takes a few words. Making a difference takes a lot of work. As the old adage goes, when all is said and done, a lot more is said than done.

The fourth religious trap Paul addresses is rules, not relationships. There is nothing wrong with winning an argument, but our goal as Christians must be to win people. Many people in this world will make their point, but very few will make a relationship. If you want to make a point, then you may be able to win an argument. If you want to win a person, then you must make a relationship.

To connect people, separated by the river of sin, to God, a relationship is the bridge we build to deliver God’s truth to them. Practically, this means it is best whenever possible to connect with people before trying to correct people. If you’re going to talk to somebody about things in their life, then make sure they know you love them and you’re seeking their best interest. Otherwise, they may think you’re trying to control or punish them. This causes lost people to hate God because they assume the mean people judging them speak for Him.

The problem with religious people is they just stand on the other side of the river and throw rules at others before they build relationships. Unsure if they care about others or have their best interests at heart, this causes lost people to hate God because they assume religious people speak for Him.

The gospel of Jesus Christ is heavy and offensive. It says we are the problem, not the solution, because we are bad, and Jesus alone is good. God’s standard is perfection. Jesus said, “You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect” (Matthew 5:38). Only Jesus is perfect. Religious people demand perfection and don’t encourage progress. They’re non-relational and discouraging. God, however, is relational and encouraging. He invites people into an eternal relationship with Him, continually perfecting them. As a perfect Father, He celebrates every step of progress.

The goal of building the relationship is to make every effort to let the message be offensive without the messenger being offensive. Honestly, every Christian fails at this to varying degrees in various relationships. Usually, the best thing is just to own it and tell the person we sinned against that both of us are sinners and need Jesus. That way, we will stand with them and invite Jesus to join us.

Years ago, God graciously provided an opportunity for us to purchase our first home that needed a lot of work. However, it was on a busy street with lots of traffic. Before we let the kids outside, I had a fence built around the yard. Was I trying to restrict their freedom? No, I was trying to protect them. The fence kept them out of danger while they had fun in the yard. God is a Father. His Word has laws, and each law is like a picket in a fence. The point is to create a boundary so that God’s children have fun and stay safe. The focus shouldn’t be on the fence but on playing in the yard.

Religious people think God’s fence is a little too broad, so they start moving it in with a few more rules today and a few more laws tomorrow. Suddenly the yard becomes a prison. Parents who do this think they’re keeping their kids safe but don’t realize the kids are going to rebel and hop over the fence as soon as they can. Religious people and their rules don’t prevent pain or harm—they inflict it. They do the very thing they hoped to prevent from happening. This is why religious parents who don’t do the heart work with the Spirit and instead try and control behavior with legalistic rules often see the most rebellious kids. Simply stated, religious rules instead of relationship results in rebellion.

Today’s Reflection

Are you better at making a point or making a relationship?