7 Simple Ways to Love Your Son or Daughterनमुना

Day Seven

"Fearfully and Wonderfully Made"

Scripture: Genesis 1:27; Psalm 139

(Lisa) I had finally found my chair and a few quiet moments alone when he knocked on my door.

“Hey, Mom, how about I make you a cup of tea and come in and read next to you?”

I’d been craving alone time, but you can’t say no to an offer like that. Not when he’s nearly sixteen and six inches taller than you. So he brought me tea, and he sat in his chair and I sat in mine. Neither of us said much at all. We just sipped hot Earl Grey and read our books in front of the warm fire, which caused me to consider something. 

We live in a world that continually tells us all the things we need to do for our kids. So we take them to sports, lessons, parks, places, and Disneyland. We are continuously running from this thing to that thing without realizing that our kids don’t know how to simply be. They don’t believe they’re wonderful just as they are. 

They might not know that because it’s not how you live. They watch you rushing around, feeling like you’re never enough. Trying hard but never quite arriving. Naturally, that’s how they see themselves too. Sobering, isn’t it? 

If we want our kids to know they’re loved for who they are and not for what they do, it has to start here—with us. Show your child she is loved for simply being her. There’s nothing she has to do to gain your approval. You already approve of her. You love her. She is valuable because she is a creation of God, made in the image of God, and someone He loves. As Psalm 139:14 tells us, “I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works.”

Yes, you appreciate your child’s achievements, but he must never come to believe you love him because of his accomplishments, gifts, looks, or any other thing. Tell him you love him just the way he is. You love who he is and his value comes from God, which is something no one can take away.

When are times you are most likely to evaluate your parenting skills based on what you are doing for your child- or his or her performance-, rather than on the value you each have in God?