Ultimate Surrender: Trading It All in for Something BetterПримерок

Room

My daughter, do you know there is laughter inside you, even here? I love to listen to it, even when you can’t hear it. I gave you such a smile—magnetic. You captivate me, and I hold your hand, and I love how we get to be together these days. I have been with you all the days, my love. I see you.

Are you asking me to show you what I see in you? Now or then? It doesn’t change, you know.

I made you determined. I made you carefree. Joy-filled, too. Have you forgotten? Your strength is practiced. You’ve chosen it when you’ve felt there was no one else to be strong. You chose control when you felt there was no one else to direct the chaos. You let your heart harden when you felt love wasn’t for you and thought you had to make things happen on your own.

You have spent your life choosing things—a way of looking at the world that has made you carry burdens. You were never meant to carry those burdens, my child. I have been here, waiting for you to give them to me.

True strength is surrendered pride. True strength is humbleness, faith. True strength is not pretending you are stronger on your own, without me leading the way.

I know you felt scared and overwhelmed. You made a decision, long ago, to not be weak anymore. You determined to be strong. You chose to count on yourself. You would depend on you.

It’s been a long road since then.

Are you ready? Are you ready, now, to give each of those burdens to me? Can you give me your heart, now, even now? Can you give me that moment when the world around you closed in and you chose to stop eating? Can you give me that moment when all felt dark and you felt you couldn’t find your way out? Can you give me that moment when you were in your room and you decided, right then, to not be weak anymore?

Can I be your strong one now? Can I come in and show you a new way of looking at this life?

There can be another snapshot. Our moment that will never end.

Exercise & Prayer

You can do this exercise alone. But better yet, you can do it with a trusted friend who loves God and loves listening to him. In prayer, confess your broken heart; confess to God a specific experience in your past that you have difficulty accepting. Consider a moment that hurt deeply, whether recent or in the past. Imagine yourself in that moment. Imagine yourself in that situation, even though you might not want to, even though it’s quite uncomfortable.

Put yourself back there and talk to God about what it feels like. Tell him all the things you wish were different and how you hurt and wish it never happened. Stay there. Then, ask God to show you where he is in this moment. Ask the Holy Spirit to show you Jesus in the place, in the experience. What is he doing? What does he see that you do not? What does he say to you? How does he rewrite the story and bring healing to your past, creating you brand new? Finally, how do you respond to him?

Father, crush every lie I’ve believed. Crush every fear to which I’ve succumbed. I give you my heart. I give you my pride—my desire to control, to change things I cannot. I trust you to give me strength and faith to follow you and change the things I can. I know you are with me. I know you never leave me. I know your plans are good, and I know you can bring me peace. Thank you for how you give me new eyes to see my story. Thank you for how you rewrote it and gave me a fresh start and a new life. You are my God, my hope, and your Holy Spirit lives in me. I believe in your truth more than in anything else. In Jesus’ name. Amen.