30DaysOfBibleLettering - Round 4 ಮಾದರಿ

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
Matthew 5:4 NIV

Comfort in Mourning

I must have been 14 years of age. It was in the middle of the night when my boyfriend called to confess that he had kissed another girl. He started explaining, but I hung up, and I cried and cried and cried. It ripped my heart into pieces – it hurt so much that I felt the pain physically. A few month ago, I found my journal from those days in which I had written, "Never again will I allow anyone to hurt me like this." 

What do we do when we get hurt, are disappointed, or experience grief? Matthew 5:4 promises comfort to those who mourn. "Mourning" in Greek is "penthos" and it means an external expression of an internal pain. It means to show on the outside what we feel on the inside, to not be in denial about our pain and to not hide it. 

Phew. But I didn‘t want to let anyone hurt me again! Ever! If I bring my pain into the open, I am basically showing the person what power they have over me, aren‘t I? I don‘t want that! For many years I buried pain deep down. Deep enough to not even realize I was in pain. But in consequence, the pain had power over me. Then one day, when a minor hurt happened, it all surfaced; I was a mess, and I knew I could no longer pretend. Today I am learning to be more honest with myself and – inch by inch – even with those who hurt me.
 
It‘s not about becoming a "whining whinger" (in German we say "Trauerkloß" which means "moaning dumpling"), telling everyone who has ears to hear about our pain and suffering. That‘s not helpful because we will just reinforce the pain. Instead, it is about processing our pain wisely – which is only possible if we admit that we are in pain and in need of healing – coming before God who wants to comfort us and possibly finding someone wise who can help us overcome. 

I can imagine that this is a big step for you. You have gone on for so long without mourning the loss of your parent, the betrayal of your partner, the disabling disease or the loneliness, and you have remained strong and independent. But you know that something within isn‘t right. So, here is my question: Is it really more important to keep up appearances of happy living instead of experiencing real joy and freedom within? In a time where we mostly share life‘s highlights and smiley selfies on social media, let us not seek image in our demeanor and relationships, but authenticity – and by that allow others to be honest themselves. I believe we will find healing and real blessing this way. And I believe you can face the pain within. I‘ve bought a few extra packs of tissues for you just in case, and the confetti and streamers are sitting here waiting, too.

by @ninastrehl