Dealing With Meಮಾದರಿ

I Thought I Was Supposed To Change Him! 

“The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands” (Proverbs 14:1). Realize you have the power to either build up or tear down your own house. You certainly don’t want to use your hands to tear down your house. God wants to make you so wise and powerful that you have an impact on your house that opens the door of Heaven in your home. 

Instead of seeing the faults of your husband or areas in which he should grow, take some time to think about the good things about your husband and make a list of them. Focus on the good, and genuinely accept him for who he is. According to First Corinthians 13:8, God’s love, “…bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” The enemy does the opposite by coming to you to accuse your husband, lie about him, or slander him. It’s your choice whether to yield to the enemy, and it’s in your power to say, “My husband loves me, and he is good, generous, smart, and hard working.” 

If you’re tempted to judge your husband, here is something you can do: Get in God’s presence and look at what Christ did for you because of His great love. See that without the blood of Jesus, you are unworthy of such a great Savior and all He did for you. He died for you! Through His blood and His sacrifice, He made you worthy to come into His presence. When you see that, you can say, “God, please forgive me. You’ve given me mercy, and I choose to give my husband mercy.” 

It’s the Holy Spirit who will teach your husband, not you. So choose not to fill the air with criticism, complaints, and negativity. Don’t hinder your husband from hearing the One who teaches — the precious Holy Spirit (John 14:26). 

John 16:13 admonishes, “However, when He, the Spirit of truth, has come, He will guide you into all truth; for He will not speak on His own authority, but whatever He hears He will speak; and He will tell you things to come.” You might say, “Well, my husband just needs a little guidance from me.” But, no, he doesn’t because you’re not the Guide. The Holy Spirit is the Guide. He’s the perfect Guide for your husband and you! 

As a wife, you aren’t equipped to guide your husband, but if you step aside and let the Holy Spirit do what He does so well, He will guide your husband. Trust God. The Holy Spirit is a Teacher, and He is a Guide. If you simply stay quiet, pray, and trust God, your husband will hear Him. 

Confession

I purpose to see the good in my husband! The Holy Spirit is the only One who has the power to convict and bring change. I will pray daily for my husband, build him up with my words, and yield to what the Holy Spirit wants to change in me. Every day I will ask the Holy Spirit, “How can I change? Holy Spirit, will you help me?”