Fruit Of The Spirit Sports Devotional ಮಾದರಿ

Leader's Guide Lesson 9: Gentleness 

Theme:

Gentleness is treating others with respect and kindness, even in standing up for what is right.

Coaches' Notes:

I have a confession to make. I used to trash talk while playing. A lot. Up until my junior year in high school, I had a decent excuse. I wasn’t yet a Christian. But once I became a Christian, I still trash-talked. Ironically, neither of my kids' trash talk on the field. Not only have I (perhaps hypocritically) raised them that this is wrong, but it’s just not their personality. They are (despite my background) unbelievably humble players.

Now don’t get me wrong, I think it’s ok to have fun on the field. Celebrating. Having fun playing against players you know well. Maybe even some good-natured ribbing (does anyone even use that word anymore?). To me, there is nothing more entertaining than watching players like Miguel Cabrera, Adrian Beltre, or Felix Hernandez have fun playing against each other.

What’s the difference between having fun and crossing the line to inappropriate trash talking? The distinction probably can be summed up in that hit song from the recently deceased Motown legend, Aretha Franklin: R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Respecting players means we value the competition and all players on the field including the umpires/refs, and other coaches. And we treat them accordingly. Do we play hard? Of course. Do we celebrate when we win? Absolutely. Do we have fun when playing against friends, maybe even talking to them during the game? Sure.

But we don’t disrespect other players. We never try to hurt other players. We never cheat as a planned play. And when someone on the other team gets hurt, we never celebrate it. What is our guide in where to draw the line? The Golden Rule from Matthew 7.12: “So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them."

Discussion Questions:

1.) Ask players how they would define gentleness as a quality on the field. Does it mean not trying to win? Does it mean not playing as hard? If not, what does it mean?

2.) Read Matthew 7.12, then give the players a hypothetical or two asking them how they would like to be treated in that situation. Ideally, something that they have actually seen in a game. Then challenge them to treat others in this same way.

Discussion:

Of all the fruit of the Spirit, gentleness may be the most misunderstood and least admired. Gentleness is often seen as weakness and for those who aren’t tough enough to stand up for themselves.

Yet Paul says gentleness is a fruit of the Spirit. What is meant by gentleness here? First of all, it doesn’t mean weakness or being a pushover. Aristotle said about the Greek word for gentleness that it is the man who is always angry at the right time and never angry at the wrong time. Even God was angry at times (Matthew 21.12–13), but tells us, “in your anger do not sin.” (Ephesians 4.26a.) 

What does this gentleness look like? It means being kind, of course. Not just when it’s convenient. Not just to our friends. And most of all, gentleness means making sure that we are very careful not to use anger or retaliation as a way to lash out at others. It will be hard sometimes. Especially when people wrong us. Especially when we think others don’t deserve gentleness. Like all fruit of the Spirit, it takes God’s help. Praying. Studying God’s word. Constantly turning to God and seeking His strength to supernaturally act differently than how most of the world acts.

So how do we have gentleness while still caring about what matters and even getting angry when appropriate? We care about what matters, leave alone what doesn’t and ask God to help in knowing the difference. Sticking up for others matters. It’s ok to tell someone at school to stop picking on someone else. Notice that in sticking up for others, you’re showing gentleness to the one who is wronged. That’s how gentleness and anger work hand in hand.

I must warn you, though. Not everyone will appreciate or respect you for your gentleness. Some might call you weak. Others may even try to take advantage of you. But you’re not weak if you’re gentle. You’re actually strong because you are choosing to be gentle when others can’t control their emotions and anger. And you don’t have to be taken advantage of. Stay strong and stand up for yourself and others. Just do it gently. When you do, I can promise one thing: others will take note. And when they do, you’ll have a great opportunity to gently tell them how great your God is.