Managing Marriage and Mental Health “Combatting Anxiety and Depression in Order to Improve Communication, Trust, and Intimacy in Marriage”Sample

Stay Connected through Consistent Communication!

Effective, transparent, and consistent communication for marital health is key! 

You must not allow communication to be lost or diminished as a result of mental illness. Talking about your feelings with your spouse can help you both learn how to manage and cope with issues as they arise. 

Checking in with your spouse often and reassuring your love and support can reduce the effects of mental illness within the marriage. 

While withdrawing or stonewalling may seem like an easier choice, that further divides you and your spouse. Empathy and empathetic communication are critical components if you want your marriage to succeed and overcome the consequences of anxiety and despair.

Communication in the form of you just being there and showing up for your spouse. You may not have to say anything in many circumstances, but your presence is a tangible indication that you care. Both anxiety and depression can be episodic, and some situations and circumstances can trigger events. Furthering your knowledge about the illness and having a support system in place will make all the difference in how well you handle these events as they occur. 

Resist the urge to make your spouse feel like there is something wrong with them but instead, lean in with compassion and understanding as you seek to learn their communication language. There will be times when you only need to listen to your spouse and hear them out. It can be painful and hard to listen at times, but they will want you to be an ear and actively listen while resisting the urge to respond. “ If one answers before he hears, it is his folly and shame” Proverbs 18:13. In the past, it may have been hard to communicate given your spouse’s diagnosis but when you devote yourself to understanding their point of view and feelings in understanding their whole self and perspective, sharing your own becomes secondary, not lost but secondary.

Taking a selfless approach will reduce ambiguity and quarreling in your marriage and help you live closer to God. There will be many days where you will have to stay on the high road, forget about being right, or sometimes heard for the sake of your peace and peace within the home and marriage. Conflict begins internally and makes its way outwardly. When you can express the fruit of self-control in the middle of an uncontrolled environment, you can demonstrate the love of Christ in unimaginable ways.

“What is the cause of your conflicts and quarrels with each other? Doesn’t the battle begin inside of you as you fight to have your way and fulfill your desires?” James 4:1

Reflection: Has communication been a challenge between you and your spouse? Has you or your spouse’s mental illness dominated and controlled the communication levels in your marriage? What can you do as a couple this week to open the lines of communication and keep them alive and active? What boundaries and measures should you put in place to assist with this?