Managing Marriage and Mental Health “Combatting Anxiety and Depression in Order to Improve Communication, Trust, and Intimacy in Marriage”Sample

Resist the urge to Withdraw!

The relationship between mental illnesses and broken marriages or divorce has been shown in several studies. Mental illnesses are said to have a variety of detrimental effects on marriages. Some couples dealing with mental health issues find it exceedingly difficult to maintain their marital health and happiness, resulting in separation and eventually divorce.

If you are reading this and saying, “this is me, or this is my marriage right now, we are struggling because of mental health challenges,” I am here to encourage you that you can decide against separation and divorce. Divorce does not fix the marriage or the person. It ends the marriage and may devastate all parties involved. You and your spouse can choose today to rewrite your marital story according to the word of God. There are countless examples in scripture where individuals faced challenges (to include mental health challenges) beyond their ability to solve, and we also witness the hand of God throughout scriptures renew and restore individuals and relationships.

The third way you and your spouse can manage mental health while managing your marital relationship is to ensure you stay connected. Aside from staying connected as a couple, it’s essential to stay connected with friends and family. God made us relationally, and our horizontal relationships (friends and family) are just as important as our vertical relationship (with God). In Ecclesiastes 4:12, the Bible tells us that “though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. Proverbs 18:24 tells us that “A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” 

The enemy will try everything in his power to keep you alone, isolated, and lonely during this time. It is a trick! When you are down, he wants to push you down even further. He does not want you to have a glimpse of the sun or light but to stay in a dark hidden place. He wants you to believe that nobody cares or understands what you are going through and that everyone is against you despite the efforts they have shown to stay connected to you. 

The devil is a boldface liar, and there is no truth in him! 

Make it your business to stay connected with others so that they not only understand what you are going through but can also lend a hand in supporting, encouraging, and uplifting you as you go through.

Anxiety in one aspect is a result of excessive worrying about something or someone. Many times, worrying is beyond your ability to change or control the situation. In this case, you can change your response to the emotions that arise, which in turn can reduce anxiety and its effects. 

Why worry about tomorrow, doesn’t tomorrow have enough issues and problems of its own (Matthew 6:34)? It is God’s job to take care of tomorrow and our job to trust him at his word.

Reflection: What can you do this week to be more intentional about staying connected with your spouse, friends, and family? How can you resist the urge to isolate yourself from the world but instead engage and share openly, honestly, and transparently with those you trust?