7 Secrets to an Awesome MarriageSample

START: The Practice of Putting God First, Spouse Second

A few years back, I was attending a conference in Amsterdam. One evening I sat and talked with a man who was a pastor from a small African village. The people in his church were very poor, but he related how they had this incredible passion for God. Then he said something that really hit me hard. He said, "I feel sorry for you and your country. You have so much that distracts you from God. My people have nothing but God."

START begins with putting God first in your life. If I asked you what is the most important thing in your life and you said God, is there evidence to prove that is true? If I looked at your calendar, what would I see? How much of your life is set aside to spend time with God? I was in a men's small group, and the leader that day asked us all to write down our top three priorities. Then we went around the table and each of us shared our list. Without exception, our lists were identical - God, family, work. We were all feeling pretty good about our answers until our leader asked us to open our daily calendars on our mobile devices and lay them on the table. Guess what? All of our calendars were almost identical, too - and none of us had time blocked off for God or family.

Let me share something with you that I have found to be absolutely one hundred percent true. When my relationship with God is where it needs to be, my relationship with Nancy is, too, and when my relationship with God is not where it needs to be neither is my relationship with Nancy. For me, putting God first looks something like this. I start my day and end my day with Him. I seek His wisdom. I pray for my marriage and my family. I filter everything that happens in my day through Him. He is first. Then and only then do I keep Nancy where He wants her to be. He is my one. She is my two. That is what START is all about.

Prayer: Pray for God to show you what it means to put Him first each and every day. Then with His help start the process.