We Stood Upon StarsSýnishorn

Wives

For my wife’s 40th birthday I took her to Orcas Island in the northwest corner of Washington. We needed time to slow down. Life is busy, and love struggles at high speeds. If it doesn’t have time to take root, it turns to lust. I’ve learned we need to periodically reset the speed of our clock, because the best love is slow. Like an afternoon passed strolling through Eastsound Village or in the rear of Darvill’s Bookstore, sipping tea and coffee and thumbing through volumes of books we never take time to read.

Days were spent walking. Romantic love is a slow exploration of a lover’s heart. It’s the simple questions. “Why does this song move you?” Or “What do you like about chai tea or wild mushrooms or the mix of trees that edge the meadow?” In knowing what she loves about these things, I learn about secret islands untraveled by anyone but me. In a crowded and charted world, these are the only undiscovered places left.

In Ephesians 5:25 we are given clear instruction about how we are to love our wives. “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”

How do we do that? In a world populated by billions of people, choose your wife. In sickness or health, choose your wife. When work has gone well or badly, choose your wife. With kids and school and sports and craziness of life, choose your wife. With temptation and options, choose your wife. Choose to take her on a walk in Eastsound Village on Orcas Island, or through your own neighborhood and to a local café.

Past the village our walk ends at a hand-hewn fence rising from wild grasses and overlooking a bay crowded with wooden boats anchored deeply enough to weather the coming storm. All is quiet except sounds of outgoing tide and poetry of sea birds. My wife wraps her arms around me to protect us from the cold. I’m safely anchored. Our love is deep November. Warm fires and slow walks ensure the safe passage of winter.

What decisions are you currently making that prioritizes other things above your spouse?

What is one thing you can do today to show how much you love your wife?