Why Wait? A Christian Guide to Sex and DatingSýnishorn
Understanding Sexual Immorality
1 Corinthians 6:12-20
“‘I have the right to do anything,’ you say—but not everything is beneficial. ‘I have the right to do anything’—but I will not be mastered by anything. You say, ‘Food for the stomach and the stomach for food, and God will destroy them both.’ The body, however, is not meant for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. By his power God raised the Lord from the dead, and he will raise us also. Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, ‘The two will become one flesh.’ But whoever is united with the Lord is one with him in spirit. Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.”
How far is too far? Sex is off-limits, but can you do other stuff before marriage? What about holding hands and kissing–how do you know where to draw the line?
Questions like these have rattled the Christian community for decades, with new opinions and books and teachings released trying to help Christians live sexually moral lives, especially while dating before marriage.
It’s no secret that there’s other stuff you can do with a partner. However, the most accepted belief among Christians is that God’s design for sex within marriage includes intercourse and any other sexual stimulation. Anything that is considered foreplay or sexual touching should be reserved for marriage.
So, is kissing sexually immoral? Many Christians don’t believe so–at least not on its own. Kissing in and of itself is not a sexual act–it’s an act of love and affection. While it can be present in sexual situations, it also exists outside of sexual stimulation.
But what’s most important when understanding what sexual immorality means in the Bible–and how far is too far–is that you seek to honor God. If you always have God at the forefront of your mind, you are more likely to make choices that honor and glorify Him and keep you free from sexual immorality and sin.
So, rather than asking yourself, “Does this count as sexual immorality?” or “Is this physical act a sin?” ask yourself, “Does what I’m doing (or what I want to do) honor God?”
Because sex inside a marriage does honor God. It’s not dirty or something to be ashamed of. When you have sex with your husband or wife, you’re living out God’s perfect design for marriage and intimacy.
However, as you navigate dating and physical intimacy, it’s essential to always be on guard and carefully consider whether or not your actions align with God’s design and plan. If you’re not sure, pray about it. Ask God for wisdom. Read your Bible and ground yourself in Biblical truth. Scripture doesn’t explicitly lay out “rules” for dating and intimacy. However, it does give you insight into God’s intention for relationships and marriage and what it looks like to honor Him with your mind and body.
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About this Plan
Were you taught that, as a Christian, you should “save” yourself for marriage and remain a virgin until having sex with your spouse for the first time? Were you taught why you should wait? In this 5-day devotional, we’re talking about God’s design for sex and why He instructs Christians to “save themselves” for marriage.
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