20 Days Of Relational HealthSýnishorn

The deeper the wound and the longer we’ve harbored it, the harder it is to break free. But in Christ, we have everything we need to live victoriously. 

One beautiful spring day, I was filled with joy and peace. My radio was on, playing Christian music, and I felt God’s presence so strong and so sure. But then, without warning, a memory resurfaced, triggering a surge of anger.

I struggled to make sense of the situation. I’d forgiven this person long ago. Hadn’t I?

At first I felt defeated. Maybe my forgiveness hadn’t been genuine. So I poured my heart out to God once again, asking Him to remove my bitterness, committing to, yet again, put the offense behind me.

I’ve since learned forgiveness is rarely a one-time event, nor does it always begin with emotion. Rather, it stems from a decision followed by a desperate cry to God for help. We may need to make this cry, and this choice, again and again and again before that wound loses power. But as we continue to draw near to our Savior, surrendering our hurts and all that swirls around them, He begins to align our feelings to match our choice.

This doesn’t mean we excuse our offender’s behavior, nor does this imply it wasn’t wrong. God commands us to forgive for our sakes—so that we can truly and completely live in love’s freedom. Forgiveness looses the hold other people’s sins have on us. 

In Luke 17, the disciples struggled with God’s command to forgive. “How many times?” they asked. Jesus, in essence, told them as many as was necessary. We do this out of obedience and with a grateful servant's heart. We may feel the person who hurt us doesn’t deserve our forgiveness, but we know God is worthy of our obedience, and so, out of obedience, we forgive. This humble act, as painful as it might feel at the time, paves the way to emotional freedom. 

~ Jennifer Slattery