Blending A Family 40 day DevotionalSýnishorn

 Vows to Your New Children—It’s Never Too Late 

One of the greatest tools a new (step) parent can use to connect to our new children is for each new parent to make vows to each new child. Spouses often underestimate just how large of a part the new children will play in the new marriage, regardless of the children’s age. When children do not feel a part, or when a child is resistant to the new spouse or family, great turmoil often develops in the months and years ahead. 

Our spouse and their biological children were and are “one” before we vowed to be “one” in marriage. Marriage vows do not circumvent the relationship they have with their children. Some spouses try to make their spouse choose between them and their biological children, or they cause a child to feel unwelcome in the home. Instead of expecting an unfair choice, make the choice to be one with their children. It is time to stop being a “step” parent. Make vows to our spouse’s children. 

Sharing vows with children will accomplish four things: 

1. The children feel significant and that they are vital to our new home. It gets all family members in the right mindset creating the right atmosphere and attitudes. 

2. The attention we give them during the vows lets them know that they are important to us. 

3. We become more aware of our responsibility toward them. 

4. We enhance the relationship with our spouse. When we love our spouse’s children, we love our spouse more completely. 

Already Married? Do It Anyway! Maybe we chose the out-of-town island wedding or our children were too young when we married. The good news is it’s never too late to let people know we accept them into our life.

Suggestions:

Share vows with your new children at your wedding. If already married, prepare a special occasion to share vows.

Give every child a chance to express their thoughts. 

Our Prayer for You

God, we pray for this Blended Family. Help them to walk in grace toward their new family. Strengthen them to be inclusive and make the right choices. In Jesus name. 

Copyright 2019 Moe and Paige Becnel @ Blending A Family Ministry