Day Seven

Sometimes we can get wrapped up in the packaging of worship and forget its true purpose. True worship can happen among fellow believers at church – but it can also happen when we are just hanging out with God. It’s not the surroundings, the music, or the time of day. It’s the posture of our hearts. God loves to spend time with us and yet, that’s one of the hardest things to give him in exchange for all he has done for us.

To have a richer relationship with God, worship is the fuel that keeps that fire burning inside your heart, and the key to reaching a deeper level with him. Nothing recharges me like the powerful presence of God – when it’s so real, it’s undeniable. Every time this happens, I walk away wanting more.

We often turn to God with “please” when we should begin with “thank you.” But it’s powerful when we can turn off our needs and focus on the incredible goodness of God and the enormity of who he is. Just think. Isn’t it amazing that the Creator who made the beautiful sunset also took the time to make you just as unique? Surely, it’s worth our time to just sit and focus on who he is and not what he can do for us. It’s when we give him that glory, with no strings attached, that our relationship with God reaches a more meaningful level.

“So, I’m going to ask you again.”

There was a season when my husband and I were searching for a new church and in a period of eighteen exhausting months I visited thirteen churches. I would go by myself the first time and if I thought Clay might like the church we would return together the following Sunday.

On one particular visit, I walked into a small country church and found a seat toward the back of the sanctuary. But over the next fifteen minutes, I was asked to move seven times because I was in someone else’s seat. Seven times this happened! It surprised me that no one was the least bit uncomfortable asking me to move as if I was clearly the one out of line.

I eventually settled into a vacant seat in the very back row, which was still up for grabs. Or perhaps the owner was out sick. Regardless, we were off to a rough start, and I’ll admit, my feelings were a little hurt.

Shortly after the service began, I suddenly smelled a strong odor of burning sage, which surprised me. About that time, I turned around to find two men waving smoldering sage in a big circle all around me as if to run off evil spirits. They seemed to be on a mission and didn’t change the expressions on their faces or stop what they were doing when they realized I saw them. It was hard to settle on an appropriate expression for my face under the circumstances because I was concerned any look on my face might be incriminating. They did not explain – and no apology. I couldn’t help but compare this welcome to the collection of gift baskets and goodies from the other churches I had visited. This scene was in a category all to itself.

Naturally, I was tempted to get up and leave but since that would only confirm their suspicions, I decided to wait it out. Can’t say it was a particularly moving or enlightening sermon, the music was dreadful, and a few still seemed to hold a grudge over the seat thing. So, another one bites the dust. Check.

I have reflected on that day several times and can’t help but chuckle as I imagine how this congregation might respond if our Blue Monarch tsunami showed up one Sunday. No doubt our busloads of women and children would probably end up standing in the back, and with the abundance of tattoos, their burning sage might set off the fire alarm.

When I pick apart this experience, it may surprise you to know that I blame myself for what happened. The fact I visited thirteen churches and found something wrong with every single one of them only shows that my expectations were ridiculously unrealistic. I don’t remember now what was on my list of requirements, but I’m sure décor and music were close to the top, and probably the pastor’s sense of humor, which had to be clever and dry. Three Stooges' humor was a definite deal breaker. (The pastor who compared his wife to all women “who only care about a closet full of shoes” was out before he could say amen.)

In hindsight, I was looking for my church to serve me, not for a place to serve. And I was looking for entertainment, not for a place to worship.

I have found the women of Blue Monarch tend to gravitate to churches that allow them to be exuberant with their worship. This makes sense. After all, their life experiences have been intense, so it is natural they would want their worship to be equally as intense. When I watch them worship, usually in the front of the sanctuary, they show a hunger for Jesus that is quite moving. Perhaps they know too well what a life of darkness feels like without him, and the memory is still very fresh. The tears in their eyes demonstrate a sense of humility and raw gratitude some of us take for granted.

Many years ago, I received a phone call from a major television network. I had been nominated to receive a national award and the first step was an interview. I was eventually asked if participating in Christian activities was a requirement at Blue Monarch. Naturally, I explained that for a Christ-centered program, nearly all our activities were Christian. But I also explained that the women who apply are typically seeking us for that reason. We don’t have to require it because that’s what they want. In other words, it's their requirement of us - not the other way around.

The woman on the phone said, “You will be disqualified if you answer the question like that. So, I’m going to ask you again.”

She repeated the question and got the same answer. And yes, I was disqualified, which was fine.

I am grateful for all the many churches that welcome our families with open arms, grace, and even patience. But I am also aware they are equally blessed. They can’t help but be reminded of why they are there when they see Jesus on the faces of the precious women and children we serve.

May I always have that same hunger for him – regardless of where I am.

Prayer:

Almighty God, thank you for being the gracious, loving Father that you are. May I always seek your face and have the courage to look you in the eye. Amen

Personal challenges and reflection:

• Do you have a routine that brings you closer to God? What does that look like?
• Do you prefer corporate worship or personal, individual worship? Why?
• Is anything missing in your one-on-one time with God? If so, what is that and what can you do about it?
• Describe a time when you spent time alone with God and tangibly felt his presence. What were the circumstances? Describe the surroundings, sights, and sounds in detail.
• What can you do to reach a deeper level with God? Are you willing to do that?

Summary:

• Have you discovered new aspects of God's personality? If so, what are they?
• In one word, how would you describe God?
• In one word, how would he describe you?
• What is your first step to knowing God even better?

“May you continue to discover the personality of God and feel his presence in big and powerful ways. Thank you for joining me on this journey.” Susan Binkley

Check out https://www.bluemonarch.org to find my blog, to purchase my book, From My Front Row Seat, or to learn more about Blue Monarch.