Love Always: A 5-Day Marriage Devotionalનમૂનો

Day 2: Love Casts Out Fear

Whenever Harold speaks harshly, Adrianne gets nervous. She rarely tells Harold that his delivery hurts her feelings because she’s afraid of his response and because she hates conflict. So, she stews about it while she cooks spaghetti. When he notices she’s quiet at dinner, he doesn’t remember his harshness from earlier. He’s puzzled about her pouting. He wishes she would just say what’s bothering her, but he fears asking her. He’s afraid she will unload a truckload of frustration on him. Those dreadfully long talks are exhausting.

Fear controls them.

They think, Perhaps all will be well tomorrow if we just sleep on it. Days go by. Weeks go by, sometimes years. You may have moved on, but has your spouse? Sometimes emotional pains don’t resurface until the same problem arises—a harsh word, a look of disapproval, pouting—the trigger list becomes lengthy with poor communication. That is why the Apostle Paul wrote, “Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry” (Ephesians 4:26 NLT). He knew bitterness corrodes relationships.

What if you unpacked your fear? You’re afraid your spouse will respond poorly if you approach a topic, so you’re silent. You’re afraid to ask your spouse what’s wrong because it may make the Mount Everest of messes. But fear should never control us. Love should. If “perfect love casts out fear” and “God is love,” then He will help you approach communication courageously (1 John 4:18, 16). He is Love, so His love can make you bold.

If you’re afraid of confrontation, pray for the Holy Spirit to fill you with His love. Then, try facing your fear with an ancient weapon: humor. God created it! Humor makes confrontation less scary. Instead of saying, “You really hurt my feelings when you spoke harshly,” try saying, “you sound like an old grizzly bear when you talk like that.” Add a roar for fun. Humor is a great weapon in communication. It keeps things light. Afterward, you can move forward because you have confronted the problem. No bitterness will keep you from sleeping peacefully.

If you’re worried your spouse will remind you of what an utter failure you are, pray for the Holy Spirit to fill you with His love. Then, meet your fear head‐on with some exaggeration: “I know I should get the award for being the worst spouse in Texas [or wherever you live], but I can’t figure out what’s bothering you. Did I mess up for the thousandth time?” Facing your fear with God’s love and a little humor will hopefully set the mood for a light delivery, instead of a dump truck load of your weaknesses.

Communicating right away takes the bitterness and fear out of your relationship. Even if all else fails, ask God to fill your heart with His love all day long. His “love covers a multitude of sins” (1 Peter 4:8 NLT). His love casts out your fears.

PRAYER

Lord, I don’t want to be afraid. Fill me with Your perfect love and teach me how to face my fears with courage and boldness. Make me creative in communicating with my spouse so we can have a fun and healthy relationship. In Jesus’ name, Amen.