The Unforgiveness Block

"I will never forgive them!" These words fell quickly from my lips.

Gently, repeatedly, the Holy Spirit reminded me straight from the Word of God that it would be best for me to rethink my hardline position. He reminded me of these verses:

"So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. Beyond all these things, put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity." (Col 3:12-14)

Before Paul tells us how to live as a God follower, he calls us three life-giving names: chosen of God, holy, and beloved. It's from this place of being seen by God in these ways that I could do what seemed like the most challenging thing: forgive someone who had hurt me terribly.

Forgiving someone can sometimes take years. It is a day-in, day-out process and a struggle not to keep a record of their wrongs. This is because true forgiveness sometimes means repeating the choice to forgive someone for what they have done to us and keep ourselves from returning evil for evil.

In addition to telling us to forgive them, Jesus also directs us to pray for them.

It’s been said that “unforgiveness is like drinking poison yourself and waiting for the other person to die from it." Unforgiveness is a joy blocker. We are the ones who suffer as, time and again, we relive the memories of the pain and stoke the fire of our vengeful thoughts.

Unforgiveness keeps us from living abundant lives that are full of joy.

By God's grace, we can choose to forgive, even if it takes us an entire lifetime to feel we've forgiven someone. What's important is that we genuinely want to forgive them and are working towards it. When we forgive others, we make more room for joy.

Prayer:

Lord, who am I that You would be mindful of me? Yet, You have shown me great love and have forgiven me for much. Help me to remember that You see me as holy and beloved. From that place, I can choose to forgive others as well. Thank You for showering me with Your grace so I can do the same for others. Help me to forgive others because You've forgiven me, and I know that will allow more of Your joy to flow through me. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.