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Slow Down

The Bible says we should be patient and wait on the Lord. In Psalm 27, we learn that God wants us to wait, gain strength, and let our hearts take courage. The same is true when you date after having gone through a divorce. Be patient. Slow down. Wait on the Lord to show you more about the person you are dating, and let your heart take courage because the Lord can and will pace the relationship if you allow Him.

The Bible also says in Ephesians 5 that all things become visible when exposed by the light, for everything that becomes visible is light. When you are patient, you can discover many new things about the person you are dating because they become visible.

Suggestions

Take some time to discuss your values to develop relationship expectations. Here's how.

1) Make a list of your values for dating, marital relations, stepparenting, finances, intimacy, and resolving conflicts. For example, one of ours is kindness. Even during an argument, we expect each other to be kind.

2) Share your values and expectations. Take time to talk about both of your lists.

3) Identify and discuss differences. It's wise to discuss adjusting expectations if you find discrepancies in your values. For example, if you both value not using credit cards, you would expect neither of you would use credit cards. But if one of you believes using credit cards is acceptable, you have different values. Talk about it. Work through this difference and any others. The main reason for doing this exercise is to establish shared expectations in your relationship.

Prayer

Lord, I ask you to give me eyes to see what you see. I ask God that you give my spirit and heart a new revelation about what I need to see and do. Your Word says that I should be equally yoked in a relationship. I pray that you give me the strength and wisdom to slow down so I can hear you. Holy Spirit, give me a kind heart to talk and grow as a Christian and couple. Lord, I wait for you, and your Word says that you will answer when I seek you. In Jesus' name, amen.