I Want It Allનમૂનો

Words

The words we speak affect others. Words can make people want to be near us or want to run and hide from us. While positive, constructive, and productive comments build others up and please God, negative and destructive words tear down and dishonor God.

We get provoked or irritated and we react without a filter. We share opinions that are flesh-led instead of Spirit-led. We suck the air out of the room with tones of disgust, anger, disapproval, or sarcasm. We give the look. We talk about other people, bend the truth, and point fingers. Ungodly talk can weaken relationships to frailty, and is as offensive to the Lord as stinky, sour milk is to us. Until we identify the destructive words we speak and expel them from our vocabulary, our conversations will continue to stink, and we will not experience the love, joy, and peace in our homes and relationships that we long for.

I polled a few friends about the stinky things they say to their loved ones, phrases that they want to stuff back into their mouths as soon as they say them. Here are a few of their answers.
“What’s wrong with you?”
“Shut up!”
“Am I the only one who can do anything right?”
“Idiot. How could you be so dumb?”
“Your teammate played terrible today! What was her problem?”
“There is no way you love me because you…!”
“Stop being so lazy!”
“If you stopped acting like a child, I wouldn’t treat you like one!”
“You always…! You never…! Why can’t you ever…?”

Have you ever let any phrases like these fly out of your mouth? I have. Why do we say harmful things like this? Negative and harsh words are toxic because they don’t leave room for grace or truth to grow. When a woman who loves Jesus speaks careless or sinful words, she wounds her own heart as much as the heart of that other person. She cringes inside. She wallows in regret. She stews in anger. She struggles to sleep and find joy. She wonders why her self-control is so lame and her tongue is so wild. And she hates it. She hates the words she spews and the tones she uses.

What would happen if we defied our sass and began to move toward becoming women who use their words to speak life, to build bridges, and to restore relationships that are weak or torn down? What kind of impact could those types of conversations have?

As I began to investigate ways to have a positive impact with my words, I came across a new word that I’m giddy about: salubrious. It is an adjective that means health-giving or healthy. Don't you love that? Say it out loud a few times. Salubrious. Salubrious. Salubrious. (You’re welcome.)

I want my words to be salubrious. I want them to be as inviting as the wafting fragrance of that candle shop at the mall. I want them to be life-giving. I want to use my words and tone of voice to bless people and love them well. Isn’t that what we all want? Isn’t that what pleases God? To be clear: I’m still a work in progress when it comes to this, but by God’s grace I am making progress.

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