If You Really Want to HelpExemple

Are you willing to go deep?

I have a question for you. Imagine you’re volunteering at a local soup kitchen. You’re making sandwiches, and you’re feeling great about the help you’re providing. Out of the corner of your eye, you see someone sitting at a table alone. The line has gone down, and you have some time before the next wave of diners comes through. Do you keep making sandwiches, or do you go sit down with someone and have a conversation?

One thing I’ve observed is a lack of relational depth between the givers and the receivers. And I’ve seen firsthand why! Relationships, especially when money and service are involved, can be tricky to navigate. It is tempting to just type in our credit card number or fill out a check and never think twice about the people who are receiving the gift. But without deep relationships, you often have what I did on our first trip to Uganda — solutions that are detached, project-based, and shallow.

In John 4, Jesus comes to a well in Samaria. There, he encounters a woman drawing water in the middle of the day. The two have a conversation, and Jesus reveals a number of things about her life — things she believed he had no way of knowing. But God knew the woman, and He knew exactly what she needed to hear at that moment. And because Jesus took the time to talk to her, to see her, and to look past her immediate needs, she went back to her village and told everyone about Jesus. An entire community was impacted because Jesus took the time to sit and talk with a woman most of the world would have ignored.

At the core of solving the poverty problem is the issue of worldview. Not money. Not stuff. Worldview. The lens through which we see the world. The poor need material things to survive, sure, but what they really need in order to sustain their long-term development is a shift in how they see themselves, how they see the world, and how they see God. And that shift simply isn’t going to come vis-a-vis a transaction.

Of course there’s no way to personally get to know everyone you are helping, especially internationally. Besides, as I pointed out earlier, those relationships can be tricky. But you can ask yourself: are the organizations you support relational or transactional? At 410 Bridge, for example, we spend a great deal of time working with community leaders to form the Leadership Council and determine what each community has to solve its own problems. We seek first to understand before we try to understand. We let them lead, we follow. And most importantly, we do with them, not for them. We don’t just decide what projects to do or where to begin. We leave that to the people who live in those communities.

Rather than just simply writing a check, take the time to do a little research. Ask some questions. And when you go to serve the poor in your own community, consider taking a seat and sharing a sandwich.

“If you really want to help, start walking with the poor.”

“If you really want to help, stop doing for the poor.”

— Crispoh Molel, Community Coordinator/ Savings Group Program Coordinator